Whether 10 minutes or 10 hours from the place you call home, coming to college is a big change–new friends, new surroundings, and most intimidatingly, new distances. College not only creates physical distances between individuals and those they are connected to, but also mental distances. No matter how close you are to someone, a physical separation can lead you to constantly feel like you’re on two different wavelengths. It’s natural to miss home, not just the location, but the friends, family, and partners that make it your safe place. You are not alone! Here are 7 tips to maintain long-distance connections with your loved ones while you are away at college!
- Share the big and little thingsÂ
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All forms of communication will help maintain your relationships. Even if you can only find time for a 30-second call or a quick photo of what you are up to, the little things are meaningful. You might not even have anything to talk about and can just enjoy the silence. Whether it’s sharing a successful essay grade or a funny interaction in the dining hall, telling your loved one about the ins and outs of your day can help keep your connection strong and allow you to both feel present in each other’s lives.
- Don’t feel guilty for living your lifeÂ
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A common misconception with long-distance is “if they wanted to, they would.” When you are a busy college student and your family, significant other, or friends are extremely busy, it is not always that simple. It’s not just about if they would, sometimes it’s about if they could. Learning to be comfortable with the fact that you won’t ALWAYS be able to reach someone over the phone is crucial to long-distance. You should not feel guilty for having your own life nor should you make the people you are trying to stay connected to feel guilty. Communicating schedules can also help you to avoid feeling like someone is not making time for you, when they are simply in class, at work, or with friends.
- Set up fun, original ways to connect
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FaceTime is a great way to replace in-person conversations, and there are so many ways to spice up a regular phone call. DoorDash each other a surprise meal to dine together, use Teleparty to have a virtual movie night, or play games on websites like Jackbox. Don’t be afraid to mix up a regular FaceTime call with something new!
- Understand and learn how to live a life separate from the one you created with your loved ones
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It’s challenging to build a life where you’re often relying on your peers, family, or partner while having to be far away from them. However, learning to live independently is incredibly valuable when it comes to long-distance relationships. Navigating life on your own not only builds resilience, but it can also create stronger bonds. When you’re independent, you’re not just relying on the other person for emotional fulfillment, you’re able to bring your own experiences and growth to the table, which can even deepen your connection in the long run.
- Have something to look forward to…
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Make plans for the next time you see each other. Is there a new restaurant you’ve been wanting to try? A road trip you’ve always wanted to go on? Whether big or small, it’s always nice to have a fun activity to look forward to. Having exciting plans can keep your connection strong and maybe even make the time apart seem more manageable.
- Plan a surprise!
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It doesn’t have to be a visit (although those are always adorable); sending a surprise care package, letter, or homemade craft is always a sweet way of letting someone know you’re thinking of them and miss them. Thoughtful gifts like their favorite snack, a playlist of songs that remind you of them, or a handwritten note can make a big impact on your loved one. Just because you are far apart doesn’t mean you can’t show your love through gifts!
- “Absence makes the heart grow fonder”Â
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Many of you have probably heard this quote and it has helped us cope with the distances college has created in my life. Try to find the good in the more chaotic moments and accept change within your life! Learning to appreciate the fact that distance can foster a relationship and, in turn, make you closer to your loved ones is going to immensely change the way you cope with long distance. College flies by fast, so make sure to embrace your time here and experience it to the fullest. It’s okay to be homesick, but remember to recognize and appreciate the many opportunities college provides to grow academically, socially, and introspectively. Â