It’s been three weeks since I moved to Denmark. Four months since I bought my plane ticket. Eight months since deciding to study abroad. And a year since wondering what it would be like to live in Europe for four months.
To say my trip to Copenhagen was a little hectic is quite the understatement. Between having a flight canceled, a flight rerouted, a flight 300 miles in the wrong direction, a flight missed, a flight rescheduled to 24 hours later, and finally a flight wedged between two man-spreaders, I could have kissed the cobblestone streets of Copenhagen.
Now that I feel more settled and comfortable in my new Scandinavian home, I finally got a chance to reflect on what I’ve done. This is not a vacation. This is not another 14-day trip before returning home. I don’t get to see my dogs in a few weeks, or go back to not being charged for water. I moved to Europe. Granted, a temporary move, but a move all the same.
I can’t help but feel like I’ve been here before, and the truth is, I have. I know what it means to leave home. I understand how much homesickness sucks. I know what it’s like to miss your favorite foods, the comforts of your own bed, and even the presence of familiar faces and friends. I stumbled on a reset button and have found myself at the beginning of freshman year (second edition).
New places, new faces, new directions and more. To add to this, I’m in a foreign country with different customs, social cues, and expectations. Two years ago I would have trembled at the thought. Now I giggle to myself when I take 180 degree turns to head in the right direction. I brush off the peculiar glances I get when violate train decorum. I confidently step into the street and stare down the cyclists as I claim my right of way. I take pictures of the beautiful city that sprawls before me and don’t worry if people know I’m a tourist.
The truth is, I am. I probably will be for a couple more weeks, and in every city I find myself in after that. But unlike myself two years ago, each experience, each challenge, each day I prove to myself how capable I am of being on my own. All of this goes to say that if you ever get a chance to “start freshman year over,” do it. Jump at the chance to learn how to feel comfortable again. It teaches you more about yourself than the familiar things ever could.
And don’t worry about what’s below when you jump, because you’ll come to realize you have nothing to fear—you’ve become your own safety net.