Feelings are tricky when you’re a single girl in college. Sometimes you don’t see them coming, and then bam! Next thing you know, they’re camping out in your heart, messing with your head, and you can’t seem to shake them. Even when it’s pretty obvious the feelings have no business being there, you let them tell you otherwise. They’re evil, I tell you. I’ve been there.
We all know you can’t control exactly when feelings decide to leave, but that doesn’t mean you can’t leave the person they’re for. It’s important not to let your feelings clout your self-values, -respect, and -worth. Here are 5 valid times when you should just let him go. But beware: after you read this, there are no more excuses!
1. You think he may be hiding something
A woman’s intuition is a force to be reckoned with, please don’t underestimate its power! Although there’s always a slight chance you could be wrong and he might not be hiding anything, if you feel this way, your mind is telling you something is not right with this guy. There’s only one way to find out: ask.
Even then, he may not be telling the whole truth, so sometimes this calls for more solid clues. Are his stories not adding up? Have you already caught him in a lie before? Check for signs. If he’s showing you signals early on that he might not be a man of his word, you may want to hit the road now. He’ll only get more comfortable lying to you.
2. He’s controlling the situation.
“But what about what I want?” If you find yourself compromising your wants for his, it could be time to head for splitsville. This isn’t to say he’s not a good guy; the two of you just simply want different things.
Bring it to his attention first. If all he wants is a casual relationship and you’re looking for more, tell him this. If he can’t understand or doesn’t want what you want, you shouldn’t settle. It may seem tempting to stick it out because you want him so badly and you’re hoping he’ll come around, but more than likely you’ll just end up unhappy, disappointed, and hollow.
3. He’s not over his ex
Okay, this one is pretty obvious, but not always when feelings get involved. A lot of women think they can help their crush get over his ex—this is never the case. Like, ever. If he got over her, it was because he got over her. No matter how great of a girl you are, if he can’t forget what’s behind him, it’s impossible for him to fully appreciate what’s in front of him. Save yourself the hurt. Let. It. Go.
4. He “doesn’t do relationships”
This kind of coincides with number 2, but there’s a difference between a guy who doesn’t want a relationship and one who doesn’t do relationships. There’s hope for the former and none for the latter. There’s a good chance a guy who doesn’t want a relationship has been hurt and is afraid to commit again. All he needs is time. But a guy who tells you he doesn’t do relationships? Translation: he doesn’t do relationships with you, or any other girl for that matter until one comes alone who he will do relationships for. And honey, it doesn’t sound like he’s that crazy about you. Which means he’s crazy. So goodbye.
5. He’s inconsistent
Is he hot and cold? One minute he’s telling you how much he likes you and the next he’s not replying to your texts. This should be a HUGE deal breaker for you! Inconsistency should never be acceptable. He either wants you or he doesn’t. He doesn’t get the right to play with you. Tell him to get his sh*t together, or you’ll get yours and go. You deserve the best, girl.