I used to think I was too picky. That I was searching too hard for the right person to come knocking on my door and sweep me off my feet. That knight in shining armor crap that movies and books suck us into. That I am looking for too much in a person and people don’t want commitment anymore. Well call me old fashion and an irrational dreamer, but I deserve someone who wants to know about me. It may sound utterly absurd, but I don’t want to be out here messing with people who never ask what my favorite color is or if I ate today. No. I deserve someone who wants to hear about my dreams as much as I want to hear about theirs. I deserve the same energy and effort I release. Because I am not a stop, I am a destination.
My mom always told me she knew my dad was the one because he put in just the same amount of effort into what they had as she did. She would tell me, “besides communication and trust, effort is the deal breaker.” “Don’t be with someone who just takes, takes, and takes and never even has a thought of giving you back what you deserve.” Well guess what, my mom was right. I am not an inconvenience, I am not sorry for my constant need to feel the love I am pursuing, I am not stupid for wanting what I deserve. I am not sorry for the way I give every ounce of my love whole-heartedly. And I hope someday I won’t ever have to apologize for any of these things and my love will be enough. I will be enough. Because I am not a stop, I am a destination.
I deserve uncontrollable laughter and honesty, consistency and the thrill of being wanted. I deserve excitement, a comforting shoulder to lean on, and a kind soul. I am not a place you can temporarily call home or a Friday night necessity. I am not some shot of confidence to boost your ego or a little cure for your “oh so lonely” heart. Instead, I am your Monday night football pal, your ice cream date at 10 pm, and your endless bundle of support. I am your jukebox as we belt out our favorite songs, and your lazy Sunday afternoons. Because I am not a stop, I am a destination.