The T.V. show You portrays the life of Guinevere Beck after she comes across Joe Goldberg at a bookstore. Joe works at this bookstore and assists her. Typical interaction, right? Except not! Joe takes a strong liking to Beck and overanalyzes the situation to the point where he thinks Beck is infatuated with him and needs to have him all to herself. The show takes a weird turn, where we see Joe stalking Beck. Despite the show being extremely creepy and showing us Joe’s deteriorating mental health it really sheds light on several key themes.
Firstly, the issue of privacy. Who doesn’t have blinds on their windows? Beck, that’s who! Joe is able to stalk Beck and watch her every move through her large bay windows which seem to have no curtains (or she always leaves them open). Who does that – especially at night? We all probably leave our windows open during the day to let in some natural light or to watch the street as cars drive by (this can be therapeutic), however, when we change clothes most of us typically have our blinds drawn. If only Beck had drawn her blinds (or installed a security system!) she could have prevented a lot of the heartbreak and headaches that she endured.
The second theme relates to privacy as well, just in the context of social media and online presence. Most of us use social media daily and frequently. Social media allows us to connect with friends, document significant memories, and stay updated with news and current trends. However, social media stalking is how Joe is able to track Beck’s moves, her friends, and other personal information – because she is an open book. The show sheds light on how important it is to keep your personal information private and not disclose everything on the internet – you never know who may be keeping up with your posts (from employers to an actual creepy stalker!).
Lastly, the show sheds light on codependency in relationships. Codependency means relying on another person for all of your emotional and self-esteem needs – similar to the show’s protagonist Joe. Joe is dependent on Beck for his self-esteem needs and when other people seem to take up Beck’s attention Joe plots ways to get rid of those people, just so he can have Beck to himself. As the relationship manifests, it becomes more toxic and leads to Joe comparing himself to Beck’s ex-boyfriend and friends, along with spying on Beck even when they are together.
Moral of the story: make sure you keep your blinds drawn, social media profiles on private, and learn the signs of a toxic relationship so that you can (run) end it before your mental health suffers, or you end up in a bad situation – it is always better to be careful! Post wisely (once it’s out there – it is out there forever) and accept people sparingly – you never know who may have access to your posts.