Friends, you make ‘em and you break ‘em; they are either going to be the greatest thing in your life, or drag you down. Here are five types of bad friends:
1) The Backbiter: This is the type of person who’s “spilling tea” on every person they know; it could be about the guy at the grocery store, or their best friend. Spilling tea, for those of you who aren’t aware, is synonymous with spreading rumors. Now keep in mind, we all gossip, however this is the toxic-kind. If your relationship is built on sh*t-talking other people, then we have a problem. What makes you so sure they aren’t saying the same things about you, behind your back? Let them spill that tea, and get burned themselves.
2) The “did you do the O-Chem assignment?” Friend: Now these are the people, who are “busy” getting drunk the night before a huge assignment is due, or who just have horrible work ethic. They rely on you for their assignments, and give you nothing in return. The first time this happens, you might be oblivious to their game, and you’ll help them out. However, if you feel like it’s a repetitive cycle, cut it off, or tell them very firmly why their actions bother you. Your hard work should not be in vain.
3) The parasite: as a Biology major parasites, aren’t just leeches, they can actually be people disguised as your friend. These are the type of friends who drain you emotionally. You don’t know if you can trust them, you let them in, and they use your insecurities against you. These people, simply put, are trash. However, please keep in mind, as an advocate for mental health, there is a fine line between a mental health disorder and being a toxic person, so just be aware of that. Mental illness isn’t an excuse for toxicity, and you should not sabotage your own mental health for the sake of someone else’s.
4) The manipulator: Friendship is built on honesty, and telling your friend, when they are messing up, that they need to pull it together. Every time you sit down for a heart-to-heart, your friend talks about their troubled past, their personal issues, or anything else that will cause you to sympathize with them. This is only a clever tactic, on their end. They are indirectly changing the topic, and this is the greatest form of deception there is.
5) The clown: if you’re interested in going to the circus, or seeing the new movie It don’t bother, you could have gotten front row seats to a clown show (aka my life for the past few months). I was friends with someone, who would ask me for my advice, not take it seriously (aka waste my time), and then end up running back to me saying “you were right.” Now this went on for months, and let me just say end it before it ends you. It’s an exhaustive cycle, and a clever ploy to waste your time.
Always value yourself and your mental health, and carefully evaluate what you’re getting from a relationship. If you’re not getting what you deserve, then just poke the person dragging you down on the forehead and utter the words “off me demon.” I’m kidding don’t do that, but definitely treat yourself like the queen you are. With each day try and distance yourself, reach out to support groups, or even confide in a friend. Make progress, even if it seems impossible or pointless, because you are closer to being toxic-free.