We Taste Tested the UWF Bathroom Condoms So You Don't Have To

One of the many perks of being a student at UWF is the free stuff. We have free cookies at the library, free chili at the housing office, oh and an endless amount of free condoms. Let me say that one more time. But are the flavors as tasty as they sound? We decided to find out with a simple taste test and rank them worst to best.

I was actually really impressed with the variety of flavors they had to offer. I assumed there would be the basic flavors like cherry and banana, but I was dead wrong. UWF’s condom flavors are hella extra. I got mint chocolate, bubble gum, chocolate strawberry and island punch.

Worst: Bubble Gum

Expectation: I figured this flavor would be the best seller because who doesn’t love gum? I really wanted it to taste just like Dubble Bubble.

Reality: It smelled like old cheap gum and it tasted like I licked a bubble gum flavored candle.

Pretty bad: Island Punch

Expectation: I thought it was going to smell like a Pina colada and summer time. I hoped it would taste like a sweet tangy pineapple.

Reality: It smelled like summer regret with a hint of pineapple. The taste was interesting. I had to keep torturing myself by trying it over and over again until I finally figured it out. It tasted like I had a mouthful of rubber bands in my mouth with a hint of pineapple soap, but somehow it managed to taste better than the bubble gum candle if that tells you anything.

Slightly less bad: Chocolate Strawberry

Expectation: I hoped it would smell like Valentine’s Day and taste like chocolaty goodness.

Reality: It smelled like an overwhelmingly sweet candle my grandma would have in her bathroom. It tasted just like this cherry flavored chap stick I got from Dollar Tree.

Tolerable: Mint Chocolate

Expectation: I wanted it to smell like the love child of milk chocolate and peppermint. I hoped it would taste like the candy from Olive Garden.

Reality: It smelled really good, like mint chocolate ice cream. It tasted like I ate a mouthful of peppermint breath mints, which I thought was really convenient. This condom helps you have safe oral sex, smells nice, and gives you fresh breath. What more could you want from a condom?

Overall, these condoms are not all that tasty. But, I have a feeling that when you use them, you aren’t going to be too concerned with the taste.

All photos courtesy of Gina Castro