When you’re in a relationship in the summer, the transition to winter can do just as much damage to your relationship as a snow blizzard can do to the streets. You associate a relationship with the sunshine, tan skin, and hours spent relaxing on the beach. Where do sub-zero temperatures fall into all of this? Pale skin? Sunsets at 4:00 pm?
Unless you’re someone who loves hibernating, winter can cause all of us to fall into a slump. These feelings can obviously transfer to our relationships. When we feel less motivated to take care of ourselves, how do we also take care of others? Here are some ways you can keep the warmth in your heart throughout the dimly lit winter months.
- Don’t reminisce too much about the past.
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I know, easier said than done. You had some good times in the summer doing things that aren’t possible to do given winter conditions. But dwelling on the past will only make you lose hope for the future. You can’t give up on a relationship because you think you’re past all the good memories. Plus, getting more comfortable being in the present is a good skill. It eases anxiety and makes you focus on what is happening in the now. No past talk, no future talk. Think about how you can tighten your relationship at the current moment.
- Know that your relationship isn’t defined by when it started.
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Really, it was the luck of the draw. I mean, who doesn’t want a summer romance?! Aren’t we all told growing up that it’s one of the best experiences? Endless movies and books say so. In all seriousness, maintaining your relationship in the winter won’t be much different than how you did in the summer. Don’t feel like you need to change the whole dynamic. If you made it through the whole summer in a relationship, you obviously know what you’re doing. Don’t doubt yourself, you got it.
- Express yourself openly.
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As I’m sure you’ve heard before, I have to advise you to communicate! If you feel yourself falling into an unhappy place, let your partner know what you need in order to get through it. If you sense your partner is in a similar position, try your best to support them. A relationship only works if both the sender and receiver are communicating. In the summer it may seem that the relationship is so GO-GO-GO that you don’t have time for as much communication. It’s easy to get caught up in just wanting to make every summer day perfect. But, if you haven’t already, invest in the communication!
With all being said, don’t worry too much about it. You’re in a relationship for a reason. When you’re all cozied up in your bed, shivering from the cold, watching the snowfall from the dark sky at 5:00 pm, thinking how am I gonna get through this? Remember — the best is yet to come!!
— Amanda Hutson
**Edited by Emma Hoechner