You may actually be one of the luckiest people – he is honestly one hell of a guy. So to you, I say congratulations and good choice. I’m sure you have no idea who I am, or maybe you’ve only seen me in pictures with him from some time ago. These pictures now being covered by a different face: your face. And no matter how many societal norms tell me to “hate” you, no matter how many people say I should think negatively towards you, I don’t. I never will. You are now his world and his happiness – there is nothing I could ask for more. He showed me a once-in-a-lifetime love. There are many things I could say about the pure perfection of our relationship and the honest love we shared, but it’s in the past now. I exist through memories, and I will never be competition to you. You hold his heart, so be confident – never compete, because he hates that. In fact, there are a few things that you will learn he hates, along with all of the things you will learn to love about him.
He will never face you when you sleep.
You will fall asleep in the nook of his body – warm and close. But honestly, he likes his own space. Don’t take it personally when you wake up in the middle of the night pressed up against the wall-side with him facing away from you. Tip: sleep on his left side.
Nothing will beat delusionally waking up and trying to hold a conversation.
He will do and say the cutest things: like digging his feet under your legs, pulling you in close, whispering parts of his dreams in your ear, and then usually turning around to let you be big spoon – he loves that.
Don’t care about how you look, please.
You’re dating him, so obviously you know he values comfort – constantly wearing clashing colors, shirts from different universities, and the beloved Wyoming sweatshirt. This is one of the most lovable qualities about him. So the next time you’re trying to figure out what to wear around him, stop. He really doesn’t care. When he looks at you and gives you that quirky smirk of his, whether you are in a dress or sloppy sweats, you are still just as beautiful to him (and I’m sure he’ll tell you and sigh that warm sigh he always does – because I’m sure you took his breath away).
Country music is his life
I’m sure I don’t have to tell you this, but he is a good ole country boy. You have the honor of driving with him, windows down, his hand in yours, listening to him belt every word to any Zac Brown Band, Kenny Chesney, or Toby Keith song. Obviously he’ll break out the good Taylor Swift and Selena Gomez throwbacks, but he does it shamelessly. Music speaks to him in a way that still amazes me – and he’ll be sure to connect you to the songs that mean most to him. The day you get that first personal playlist, listen to it…. Over and over again. Light a candle and intently listen to the lyrics, because those are the words he can’t conjure up to say to you face-to-face.
His family are the best folks I know
They are the most unselfish people I know – his mother is beautiful and might just be second best to your own mom. Make sure when you get the opportunity to go to his beautiful small-town home, spend time talking to his mom in the kitchen, and NEVER deny drinking the sweet tea (trust me, it’s the best you will find in a good 50 mile radius). His dad is the embodiment of his hero – he is practically a brother and you will never see him without a smile on his face or a beer in his hand. As for his brother, well I am still convinced they are twins, in such a way that he has the same heart and conveys the same intelligence and warmth. You’ll watch him finish his brother’s sentences, joke with his dad, and give the biggest hugs to his mom. You’ll see his family means the world to him, no matter what the rough patches.
His best friend is his rock – but don’t mistake the love he has for her to the love he has for you.
Just stop. She has been with him through everything. And trust me, dating him while he is closest with another girl may superficially seem hard – but you’re just thinking too much about it. He has the biggest heart I know, and goes above and beyond for those he loves in his life. But the love he has for you is totally separate. You are his life, and he would do more for you than you will ever know. His best friend will always be there, as a friend should, supporting him through his journey. She has a beautiful soul and is an admirably selfless person – something that took me some time to realize and accept.
He will occasionally be a closed book and won’t come up with the right things to say.
Don’t take his silence negatively – he’s just comfortable with you. He takes things slow, so don’t expect him to tell you those three little words immediately…. he values the difference of “loving” someone and being “in love” with someone. He won’t let you in sometimes when he’s upset, but don’t close yourself off just because he is being passive. Be there for him when he decides he really needs your help, love, and support. When he opens up to you about past issues and experiences, don’t take it lightly – it took a lot of trust for him to show you his true self. Just always reassure him that everything is okay: wrap your arms around him, run your hands through his hair, awkwardly hug his boney shoulders, and cherish the moment. Value that embrace, because it can be stripped from you faster than you know.
I could give you more and more tips, but I want you to figure these things out on your own – that’s the best part. Each and every day you will find something new about him, and you will fall deeper and deeper in love. You will spend moments together crying – he rarely cries so take it seriously – and you will spend moments laughing until your stomach hurts. His outlook on life is to take on the world one day at a time, so be patient because it’ll be worth it.
He was the best part of my life for nearly a year. I refuse to forget him, I refuse to stop loving him, because then I would be forgetting a part of myself. Our time together was the most precious, but the relationship couldn’t last. I took everything for granted and regret every moment of the downfall, but I have so much hope for you. I know that he loves hard and deeply, and he would give his life for you – the girl who finally makes him happy. All I ask is that you love him in every way I couldn’t, don’t break his heart, and stay loyal. Don’t be afraid to fall too fast (trust me, he’ll make it easy). He’ll always be there to catch you. He deserves someone who is able to give him their whole heart. I couldn’t do it, so I only hope that you can. He deserves to be happy.
So, to the girl who has the honor of being his love and holding his heart, cherish it. Cherish every moment you have with him. Keep him around. Don’t drag him through anything, he’s been through enough. I wish you the best and brightest, loving future – nothing short of happiness.