There are many things I wouldn’t consider myself an expert in (i.e. being a real adult or truly understanding how to use Excel for example), BUT handling long distance relationships is one concept that I would say I have serious practice in. Being long distance is never easy because being in a relationship is having the physical presence of a person and being able to be a part of their every day life… yet, there are ways to work with the reality of the distance.
The reason I say that I’m so knowledgeable on the subject is because in my two year relationship, about 11 months of it has been long distance. So, here are a couple of things I’ve picked up along the way and hoping that it helps you handle going the distance (ha ha ha, see what I did there?)…
Good morning and Goodnight:
I’ve had up to a 16-hour time difference with my boyfriend and let me tell you, it isn’t always easy to keep up with his daily life when that kind of time difference gets in the way. The one thing to keep constant? Always, and I mean always, say good morning and good night. Even through the craziness of what your daily schedule brings on, you should always let your significant other know that they’re the first thing you think of when you wake up and the last thing you want to remember when you’re falling asleep.
Oh Facetime, what a lifesaver you are. Not only is it a great way to catch up on everything that’s been happening in your respective lives but also it can be a “faux” date night if you let it be! One idea that always made Facetime fun with my boyfriend was taking quizzes and tests together. There are so many of them out there for couples and it’s always a creative way to create a memory without being physically around one another.
Showing You Care:
This requires extra planning on both of your parts. Just because you aren’t actually there to show your love doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do it from a distance!
For example, I helped make my S.O.’s birthday extra special when I wasn’t there one year. I made sure that his friends picked up his favorite cake that I had ordered, sent him gifts in the mail and had another friend deliver a note to him! It made it seem like I was there without being there. The extra steps can really go a long way.
This is vital. If you’re doing long distance, you know that this is a temporary state of things. So, it’s important to focus on the steps after long distance: what are your goals and your plans? This not only helps you grow as a couple but it gives you trips and things to look forward to together!
Living in the Moment:
The hardest part about distance is not having them be in your daily life but it’s also part of the best thing as well. Being abroad and having these experiences are also a time for you to grow personally. If you’re in the right relationship, they should be supporting every endeavor you take on. So, while you do need to make sure you’re paying attention to your S.O. – don’t forget to pay attention to yourself as well! I know too many girls that have lived by their phone and not remained in the moment because they were waiting on their man to call them or text them. Believe me, you’ll regret not making the memories that await you. Plus- next time you call your honey, you’ll have more to talk about!
Moral of the story: Plan when bae time is as well as when to put Facetime away!