Congratulations on having the guts to transfer to a new school. It’s a hard decision, and the fact that you had to re-fill in everything on the Common Application website deserves some commending. At this point you’re probably thinking, “Now what?” You’ve arrived at a new school and even though you’re no longer a first-year, you kind of feel like one. Even worse, though you may feel like a first year, you aren’t actually one. You no longer have swarms of other people looking desperately to make friends with you. Do not despair, there are definitely some pro-active steps you can take.
Join Groups: This seems super obvious, but if you don’t have any groups in mind you might just end up sitting in your dorm room and wishing you were out having a good time with friends. Even if you don’t necessarily want to be the president of a club or organization, it’s a good idea to get out there and go to the meetings just to meet people! Chances are there are other people in this group that are new too so they will also be there looking to make friends. It might be uncomfortable, but think about the fact that other people there are just as out of their comfort zone. If you’re a transfer, you’re going to have to get over that quickly.
Don’t be afraid of first-years: I know that you’re a second-year (or third-year for that matter), but let’s be honest here. Most second- and third-years already have a settled group of friends. You’re going to find other friends who are in your same year, but in the mean time, the first-years are the ones who are actively looking for new people to meet. Since you are in the same boat, don’t shy away from that! While, yes, you do eventually want to make friends with people who are also in your year, first-years really aren’t that bad. And you guys can get lost together and feel a little less dumb about it.
Approach people in your classes: Take advantage of big lecture courses and sit next to different people each time. Feel them out. Obviously if they don’t want to talk then there’s nothing you can do about that, but ask them their name and casually chat about the class. They might not be your best friend, but it’s nice to know people’s faces while you’re walking around even if you’re not having lunch with them every day.
Take chances: Get over yourself, grow a pair, and ask people out to lunch! Or dinner, or studying, or coffee, or the social event of your choosing… in general people are nice. If you’re talking to someone in your class and it’s around noon or so, casually ask them if they want to head to Bodo’s or if they are headed to another class. If they say no, it’s fine. If you’re feeling a connection with them, ask for their number and do lunch another day. If not, there are plenty of other people in that 300-person lecture class of yours.
So, get out of that shell of yours, smile a lot and talk to people! You’re never going to meet your new best friend in that dorm room of yours.