The two most dreaded words a couple will face: long distance. Is it possible? You bet. Is it hard? Yes. Can you make it easier? Absolutely. Summer doesn’t have to be the end, it’s simply the beginning of a new chapter in your relationship.
You live and you learn, and I’ve been on this boat for three years and counting! Many people say that it’s too difficult to manage, but I’ve learned a few things about long distance relationships along the way. To save you from having to figure it out (occasionally the hard way) here are a few tips to ease the transition:
Skype (or talk) frequently:
Take a 10 minute study break, grab a snack and log onto Skype. Instead of Skyping once a week for four hours, dividing up the time is a great way to stay close but still be able to keep up with your workload. Plus, being able to see the other person eases the sometimes overwhelming ache that you aren’t physically together. If you’re ever on a solitary walk or just feel like talking, pick up the phone and give him or her a call. It may seem old fashioned, but being able to hear his or her voice over the phone and being able to catch up with more than 140 characters per minute is a great relief.
Visit:
Once the craziness of a new school year has begun to settle down, plan a visit! There are many travel options, from trains to buses or even fellow students that may be headed that same way. Make sure to avoid spending too much time away from school, as it’s important to stay active in your own school’s community. Remember, breaks are the most convenient times, so try to schedule around those.
Be Flexible, But Honest:
Let him or her go out to parties and get involved in activities, just as you should do during your college years. However, boys will be boys, and girls will be girls. It’s natural for jealousy to arise, particularly when your boyfriend or girlfriend makes friends with someone of the opposite sex. You may think, it’s not fair, this girl get’s to see my boyfriend more than I do. Don’t panic, but be honest with him or her if anything makes you uncomfortable. It’s important to be open about these things, so they don’t escalate to the point of no return.
Small Tokens:
Particularly when couple’s are in long distance relationships, having something small from the other person makes a big difference. You don’t have to wear an oversized t-shirt he left around as a constant reminder. For two of three years of my long distance relationship, my boyfriend wore one of my hair ties around his wrist. On our third year anniversary, he gave me a ring with both of our initials on it, and had it engraved with our anniversary and the date. Though this is just my experience, it could be anything from a keychain to his favorite pair of sunglasses. Trust me, these little things go a long way on stressful days, as a little reminder that you always have someone there for you.
Send Letters (and the occasional package):
You may be asking, why send letters when you could pick up your phone and text him or her? Sometimes, the old fashioned way is just better. There’s nothing more exciting than ripping open an envelope and getting to read (and re-read) something so detailed and personal. I find these letters adorable, and they last longer than a text in your inbox. It’s a fun thing to do together, and you’ll always be able to go back and re-read them during a bad day. Sending small care packages is simply another way to show you care. It doesn’t have to be big, it could be his or her favorite candy or a pack of gum, it could even be an inside joke between the two of you. It’s a guaranteed way to get a smile.
There’s no need to risk losing a significant other due to distance. Long distance relationships are difficult, but they are definitely manageable. These hints are taken from my personal experience and will help you avoid some of what I found to be the most challenging aspects of being in a long distance relationship. Sure, you’ll hit some bumps in the road, and sometimes you may think that it’s not worth it, but you’ll never know unless you go ahead and give it a try.