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Finding “Your People” In College Is HARD

The opinions expressed in this article are the writer’s own and do not reflect the views of Her Campus.
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at UVA chapter.

From the moment it donned on me as a freshman in high school that many of my peers and I had different interests, I developed this belief that college was where I would blossom surrounded by people like me. However, I have to admit that this has not been my experience because I have not made an effort to find these people, my people.

As a first-year at the University of Virginia who can be shy from time-to-time and is not big on the party scene, I have not made much headway in finding “my people” in college.

I have been in Charlottesville for just over a month, so why do I feel this way? Well, I see massive groups of girls walking on Grounds together and I envy that connection. However, I realize that I don’t need a bunch of friends; I just want a few good ones.

As part of one of my classes, The Resilient Student, I have had to reflect on my situation. Through the class I will be undergoing a process of self-discovery to get a better understanding of how and why I prevent myself from trying to make friends. I will put myself out there by inviting classmates to join me on activities that I have been meaning to do, but have told myself that there is no one to do them with. I owe my motivation to finally try and connect with new people to this class, because otherwise I would still be stuck.

If you are a first-year, second-year, third-year, fourth-year, or even graduate student in the same situation, I want you to know that you are not alone. Finding people you can have a genuine and meaningful friendship with is tedious. According to my Professor Tim Davis, you have to meet at least one-hundred people to find the one.

So if you are anything like me, I urge you to let this article be your motivation to put yourself out there. Or if that is too difficult, take The Resilient Student so you are graded to do so, because I know if you go to UVA you prioritize your grades.

Don’t buy into the myth, at the end of the day, college is not the BEST four years of our lives; It is simply JUST four years. But we can still make the most of them!

Hey y'all, My name is Laura and I am from the Eastern Shore of Virginia. Here are some rapid fire tidbits about me... :) I am a beach bum (shoutout Assateague Island) and I listen to Jack Johnson on repeat. I am a book lover. My favorite genre is fantasy and series is Harry Potter. I am a planner and thrive on structure. (My Google Calendar is my best friend.) I am passionate about mental health as a perfectionist who is trying to learn balance. I don't feel fully at home in college as I am a night-in enthusiast and I value authenticity in other people. I love going on a long walk while listening to a podcast, preferably either Eli Rallo's or Emma Chamberlain's. I keep up with pop-culture every now and then. My obsession right now is Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce's relationship. I cannot get enough of them! My favorite television show is Sex and the City. I aspire to have such amazing and encouraging female friendships. Also, Mr. Big and Carrie are end-game. Lastly, fashion is a guilty pleasure of mine. I try to be aware of current trends, yet purchase timeless pieces. I am currently in the process of building a capsule wardrobe. I hope this gives you a taste of what I may be writing about here at HerCampus... XoXo, Laura