Don't Call This Goodbye

When I met you, I truly thought our relationship would go a long way. It’s okay that I was wrong. I was wrong before. However, the way you made me feel is not okay. 

Making someone feel like a second choice is never okay, and it’s a feeling that never goes away. When I date someone, that person means the world to me. There’s no one I’d rather spend time with than that person. 

Understanding a person’s priorities is intensely important in any relationship. Your inability to discuss serious matters is what ultimately made it impossible for us to stay together. Communication is the key to any relationship for me. It wasn’t for you.

Like I said, that’s okay. Blaming the issues on me, though, is not okay. I certainly don’t blame you. We have different styles.

I know we will run across each other eventually. I guess one good part of a long distance relationship is your ability to avoid each other when you break up, though. I’d rather not avoid you as I did once enjoy your company, I know that it is best. 

When we do run into each other, I hope that we can both be at peace. We can know that our relationship didn’t serve us and walk away peacefully. I know that that’s not true, though. I know that we will both doubt our decision to end our relationship. I really hope that I can know we did what was best. 

You told me you saw red flags. I did too, but I hoped we could talk about them. I thought we could talk about them. I realized that talking about serious subjects with you is painful. I also found that any discussion I imagined in my head came back to those real red flags. 

When we fought that last time, you gave us a minimal amount of time to work things out, and you kept postponing our talk. I couldn’t handle that. I can’t feel like I’m not a priority. I know I deserve more respect than you were willing to give me. 

To me, a lack of respect is the last thing I can deal with. 

So, this is the last time I plan to give you a page-worth of thought. I would call it goodbye, but as Lizzo says, “we don’t do goodbyes.”