We all have an idea of what kind of friends we want to have. We may want a friend who is nice and gives us advice. We may want a friend that is always inviting us somewhere. I believe, to have the best friendships possible, that we need to be that friend that we would want to have. If we each took it upon ourselves to be the ideal friend then we will have created an atmosphere for others to do the same.
It seems unrealistic to expect a friend to invite us to things often if we never invite them to anything. However, we don’t always take on that responsibility. We can’t expect something from someone if we are not returning it. Sometimes we need to be the one to initiate the invitation. This could be as simple as getting lunch together, having a movie night, or a mini road trip. Go get coffee together before class or go for frozen yogurt after. These things don’t even have to cost money. They don’t have to be fancy. The idea is to put time into your friendship in order to expect the same from the other person. I think it’s convenient to place the blame on someone else because it’s easier than doing something about it. Personally, I’m bad about this. I think about friends I haven’t seen in a while, and my first thought is usually something like, “Well, they haven’t reached out to me.” But I never reached out to them either. If both sides thought that way, we would never see each other. Life is busy, and things happen. This is why it’s important for both sides to make an effort.
Do you wish your friends contacted or talked to you more? Then talk to them more. Be the one to send the first text. If you want a friend that listens to you, be the friend that listens to others. Humans are naturally kind of selfish. It’s so easy to rant to someone about a bad day, an unfair professor, or anything in life really. It’s not as easy to sit down and simply listen to someone else. We get bored, or we’re disinterested in what they have to say. We can’t have that perspective, though. If you’re not great at listening, sit down and try to listen to your friends for a change. That could make all the difference. They’ll definitely appreciate it, and it will make you a better friend for it.
If you want a friend that helps you, be the friend that helps others. Whether it’s with homework or a problem that they are having, help them in any way you can. Explain a topic to them that they don’t understand. Study with them. When they’re struggling with a personal problem, give them advice. Just be there for them, especially when no one else is. We all have homework to do, quizzes and tests to study for and naps to take. Sometimes you just have to drop what you’re doing to show them how important they are to you.
Make the effort to be the best kind of friend that you can possibly be. It can make all the difference in someone’s life. And, in turn, it can make a huge difference in your life as well. This is how lifetime friends are made. A college campus is full of people from all different walks of life, therefore, college is the perfect time to gain these lifelong friends. Make sure you’re putting in the effort. Be the friend you would want to have.