Shoutout To My Ex

Well Little Mix may have found all the perfect words before I had the chance to, that doesn’t mean that they couldn’t be reiterated. Whether we like it or not, heartbreak is a part of life. Even when that guy seems like he is going to be your forever, life loves to throw us the most inconvenient of curveballs. Ask Taylor Swift, she’s written an entire album worth of songs about true love gone wrong. Although it may seem like your entire world is crashing down, relief is just around the corner. Here are some silver linings to keep in mind for when the days of rain seem to have no end in sight and just some tips for helping you survive and conquer.

If it didn’t work out, then he can’t be the one

Whoever is meant to be in your life will always make their way to the surface. There is no “one that got away” when they were the one who let go of something so amazing. Just remember that whoever you are supposed to be with would never be crazy enough to put themselves in a position to lose you. There is always a reason for a breakup. When you get weak and think about texting him when you are alone and overthinking, just remember what it was that caused you two to part ways and how a weak-moment text isn’t going to change that.

Use this as your motivation to reach your goals

One of the best revenges you can get on an ex is working on bettering yourself and making them regret what they lost. Use the built up anger to kill an early morning workout. Nothing says revenge like getting the body you've been dreaming of. When you are going for a run, use that anger to push you to run another lap. He is now your motivation to do another set, run the extra mile, and to never skip leg day. Yes, getting in shape to make him jealous is one thing, but get in shape for yourself, too! Also, don’t allow him or the breakup to bring you to a low. Having days where you want to just curl into a ball on the couch with endless pints of ice cream is totally acceptable. Sometimes you just need to shy away from all of your responsibilities and get lost in a Netflix series, but don’t make it a habit. The days seem to never end now, but with time, the support of your friends and family, and you reminding yourself that you will get through this, you will be thriving and stunting in no time. The best revenge is doing better without them. So when you see them in the hall at school or from across the mall, throw that sassy crooked smile on your face, flip your hair and remind them of what they can’t have anymore.

 

 

You may learn that they weren’t all that you thought they were

When we are in love, we tend to be blinded by all the good and “perfection” we see in that person to fully realize all of the negatives that they carried with them. We may be too distracted by their smile and their eyes to notice that those eyes may not always be looking right at you. Their popularity and social status may have made their inability to stay faithful “acceptable.” Now is the chance for you to see them for who they really are and finally take in their true colors. Once you realize that they weren’t as perfect as you may have once thought, being able to realize what you deserve and find better will be easier whenever you’re ready. Now that you have the knowledge of who they are, don’t forget to remind yourself of that for whenever they come crawling back because, let’s be honest, they always come back. So stand your ground, remember your worth, and never settle for anything less than you deserve.

 

DO NOT FIND A REBOUND!!!

I don’t know what it was that put the idea in our heads that the best way to get over a breakup is to get under someone else, but I would like to have a strongly worded conversation with whoever created that idea. In the moment, it may feel nice to be rebellious and bring the cute guy home that you met at the party because you can, but in the morning, you are going to wonder what got into you. Being with someone who is interested in you for all the wrong reasons is only going to make you lose sight of what is important, which is learning how to be okay with being on your own and being happy with yourself as a person. Waking up with some random person in your bed isn’t going to make you feel better about yourself. Never forget your self worth. But the rebounding doesn’t stop there. Jumping right into another relationship after ending things with your high school sweetheart is not the way to go. Jumping from one relationship to another doesn’t help you grow as an individual. It is important to find yourself and to find love in being single before you can have love with someone else.

Ex’s suck. That is just the flat out truth of it. They make us scared to try again with someone new, all of your favorite places remind you of him, and you feel as though you have a dark cloud constantly hovering over your head. While these days seem to go on forever, it has to get worse before it will get better. The days where you don’t think about him will come, yes slowly,  but they surely will. But in order to get there, you have to put in your legwork. Try your best to not stalk their social media and check in on their every move. You don’t necessarily have to delete all of your pictures, but maybe try and take them off of your phone and into an album on your computer. But above all, put yourself first. This is your time to heal and get your happiness back without the help of someone else. Do what you need to do to feel whole again, because what doesn’t kill you surely does make you stronger. This heartbreak may slow you down for some time, but it won’t ever stop you.

This is just a little shout out to my ex. I’m all the way up and I swear, you’ll never bring me down.