Why is there prejudice toward people who stay home for college? I feel like we often hear things like how unsuccessful the next person to attend their hometown college is, how they can’t bear to be away from home long enough to enjoy themselves or how they won’t be able to survive in the real world.
But none of this is true, and I can confidently say, as someone who has gone away and been the person who judged my hometown friends, it doesn’t matter where you spend your four years of college. All that matters is that you’re happy. College is for breaking away from high school norms and starting fresh.
When I went away to college, I was surprised to find that it actually broke me down and I felt like I lost who I was as a person. I come from a very close family that does everything together. Living with a stranger for the first time and not seeing my family took a huge toll on me. But this is when I realized that not everyone is meant to go away to school, and that is absolutely okay.
Everyone who played a role in my life not only knew how unhappy I was my first year in college, but they could truly feel it. Although I never told anyone how I was feeling, my loved ones could tell when I visited home for the first time. People told me I lost my “bubbly personality,” and it was true. Before long, I was barely getting by with my grades and I had no ambition to put effort into nearly every relationship I had – whether it was with friends, boyfriends or family friends.
I felt everyone distance themselves from me because I was doing the same first. No one and nothing was making me happy anymore and, truthfully, I didn’t even want to be happy because I didn’t seem to care. By the end of my first semester, I was single with terrible grades and had less than a handful of friends left. I found myself unhappier than the start.
During winter break, I visited my parents in Florida for over a month, with no one from school or home, and I just focused on me. I found myself feeling a little better – not necessarily where I wanted to be but better. In January, I began writing for an online magazine and met some really great friends at school, but I was still missing home more than ever and struggling in my classes. I found myself traveling home every weekend because I couldn’t bear to stay on campus.
Once the year was over, I still wasn’t happy at school but figured I would be fine by the end of the summer. But I ended up moving out on move-in day and ultimately decided I needed to go home. I enrolled in a private college in my hometown and have been so much happier ever since.
I thought I would be judged for going to school in my hometown, but upon reflection, I realized that letting that thought stir around in my head is actually what kept me from being happy. I had too much pride to come home or to say I wanted to come home, and it kept me from succeeding. Now, I am doing very well in school, I even made the Dean’s list. I reconnected with my friends and am well on my way to accomplishing the goals I have always wanted to achieve.
Don’t ever be afraid to do what you want because of what other people think. At the end of the day, I don’t regret my first year at college. I learned from my experiences and think this all happened for a reason because my year at college morphed me into the person I am today, and I am proud to say that.