I’ve always wanted to be known as ‘that’ girl.
The girl who could accomplish all things without the help of others. The girl who had control of her life and always looked strong on the outside. A valuable lesson that I have recently learned is it’s okay to not have your life all the way put together, and most all of it is okay to ask for help.
I’m not sure if it stems from insecurities or feeling like a person is a burden to others, but it can be difficult to admit that you can’t do it all. I feel like all of my emotions need to be justified in order for them to be valid. No matter how crazy you feel your emotions are, there should always be a person you feel comfortable confiding in; whether it be your parents, your friends, or a more trained professional who can listen and give advice.
You may think: There is always someone who is going through a more difficult battle, why should I complain? Why should my problems matter? The answer is simple; YOU matter! It’s okay to ask for help, here are 6 reasons why it’s okay!
1. I’m sure there are people in your life that if they knew you were struggling would be more than happy to help! It is okay to reach out and let people know that extra support would be nice. It is important to remember that in order to gain support, people need to know what is going on in your life.
2. Don’t apologize for your emotions. Whether you failed a test you studied hard for, or you lost someone close to you, it is how you are feeling and that shouldn’t be discounted. Stop acting like your emotions aren’t a big deal or that they too much for someone else to deal with.
3. Don’t compare yourself to how others deal with their emotions. Although ‘that girl’ seems like she has it all put together, it is important to remember that we all deal with situations in different ways. If this person is truly not talking about their emotions this could be extremely destructive and be hurting them more than anything.
4. Realize that there will always be difficult bumps in the road. Life is all over the place and always changing, and sometimes it can be hard to keep up, laughing through the chaos can make even the most difficult problems solvable.
5. If you are confiding in another person always be ready for constructive criticism. Sometimes what you don’t want to hear is exactly what you need. It may be difficult, be open to change and always thank people for their advice, even if it isn’t the most helpful in your eyes!
6. If someone confides in you and is the one asking for help, remember what it feels like to be in their shoes. Being empathetic and compassionate about others feelings is important. Saying ‘I’m sorry’ isn’t always good enough, it’s reminding a person that there will always be bumps in the road, but no matter what you will be there for them and there is never a trial big enough that they can’t get through.
Let’s face it, collegiettes, we are in the most hectic part of our lives. As if college isn’t hard enough, throwing in external emotions can be enough to make anyone feel overwhelmed. That being said, there is never a problem you have to face alone if you allow the people who care about you into your life.