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The Struggles of Being an Outgoing Introvert

Everyone knows the classic stereotypes of introverts and extroverts. You’ve got the painfully shy people who would much rather listen than be listened to, and then there’s the people who love to talk to everyone and never seem to second guess themselves. But what about those of us who are somewhere in the middle? Those of us who don’t mind going out and having fun, but require a lot of convincing first. Those of us who can be very shy and quiet until you get to know us, and then we’re the weirdest people you’ve ever met. We are called outgoing introverts. Let me tell you, life ain’t easy – and here’s why.


Making friends is scary.

Trying to hit it off with new people can be really intimidating, no matter how nice they turn out to be. I just want to be friends with everyone and have them all like me, but it’s rare I’ll make the first move. What if they think I’m weird? I hope that if I smile enough, they’ll know what a nice person I can be.


Social life? What’s that?

Don’t get me wrong, I am all for going out and having a good time with my friends, but sometimes watching Netflix and eating peanut butter straight out of the jar is the kind of night I want. Even if I am super excited to go out, I’ll get second thoughts right before it’s time to go. My bed would miss me, right? It usually takes some very persuasive friends to change my mind back, but I am always happy I went with them.



Avoiding public at all costs.

Maybe this is just me being lazy, but if I have to go anywhere where I will actually be seen, I will avoid it to the point that it’s almost ridiculous. I have to go run errands? I’d rather stay in bed than go on Trax and risk interaction. I should eat dinner? I’ll be making mac and cheese in my dorm room unless I can force a friend to go with me. I hate dealing with people by myself.



The social anxiety is real.

This is similar to some other points, but nonetheless important to mention. Pretty much in any type of social situation, I will stick by the same two people out of fear from being alone in a room full of people I do not know. It’s like I forget how to speak as soon as I need to. Every cool or funny thing I’ve ever thought suddenly leaves my mind and all I can do is laugh at other people’s jokes and pray I don’t get left alone.



Speaking my mind isn’t easy.

I generally try to avoid conflict by all means necessary. It’s not that I do not have an opinion because, boy do I have a lot of them. I tend to keep them to myself though because the last thing I want is to offend someone. It takes a lot to for me to work up the courage to say what I am really thinking. So if I choose to put myself in that kind of situation, what I’m saying is extremely important to me.



I’m a damn good friend.

This isn’t so much a struggle, but it is always good to point out your strengths! If you are my friend, I genuinely care about you and I will always be there for you. Want to watch movies on a Saturday night and eat ice cream? Need someone to talk to? I’m your girl. You can always count on me.


We may have times where we could easily fit into the main categories of introvert or extrovert, but more often than not, where we fit in is smack dab in the middle of the two. Our quiet moments and crazy moments alike show just how much we need our own category, for we are complicated people. But there’s no doubt that we could be the best people you’ll ever meet as long as you give us a chance. There’s nothing else I would rather be than an outgoing introvert. I mean, I think I’m pretty cool.

California native transplanted in Utah.I love sushi and hate seafood. I understand I'm strange, let's just accept it and move on.
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