So… I see that you’re not fond of your best friend’s new “friend”. It could be a new platonic friend, a f**k buddy, or the worst of them all – “boyfriend” (or “girlfriend”).
What is it about them? Is it how they dress, how they treat your friend, or maybe it’s just because they hate Nick Jonas? But these are only a few of the seemingly endless reasons of why may just not like your best friend’s significant others. And if you think about it, it’s actually a pretty common thing – especially if the relationship doesn’t go your way (and yes, there comes a time when we get in the middle of our best friend’s relationships). Either way, we just want the best for our best friends, right?
I, personally, have had MANY experiences where I wanted to throw my best friend’s boyfriends down a flight of stairs, because of how they treated them. Some of them were controlling, manipulative, and so much more. And there were even times where I thought that nothing would be more satisfying than having the time and place to break up my best friends’ relationships, especially if they were in dangerous situations. Unfortunately, I was always the bigger person, and just let my friends sort out their ordeals with the men in their lives. However, I did (and still do) use these tactics in order to deal with my own personal feelings towards the significant other, and help me get through the relationship, without devising an evil plan to break them up.
First, I figure out why I hated the boy (or girl). I usually scroll through every Instagram photo the son-of-a-b**ch posted, along with their Facebook walls, and other social media outlets they may participate in. Besides the social media, if I was every around the SO, I would analyze every single move within their behavior. Can I tell if they lie? Do they have sh*tty eye contact? How do they thoroughly communicate to my best friends? These analyzations can help you realize why you hate that certain person, and that can help you in the long run when protecting your best friends. And if after doing your research you find the only reason why you hate them is that you personally just don’t get along with them, and if it really bothers you, talk to your friend about your feelings. Or you can suck it up, and be an adult about it. But in the end, ou have to think about why you do not approve of them, before you make a stupid and irrational decision on your part.
My next step of the equation I would suggest, is if you’re trying to work out your issues with your best friend’s SO, maybe go and confront your problems to the significant other. Talking it out makes relationships flourish more than keeping your feelings inside – because passive aggressiveness will not be your friend. You never know; the problems may dissolve, and everyone will be happy with each other! However, in my experience, when I told my best friends’ boyfriends and girlfriends how I felt and what my problems were with them, most of them would either brush it off, or yell at me for being too “protective” and “jealous”. And in ome cases it is just a friend being overprotective, but sometimes, it can be a serious thing when you start to notice all the bad qualities about that certain person. and it may be time to point out said red flags.
And before I go on to my final step, this is NOT an article teaching you how to break a couple up. This is about dealing with a friend’s SO that you may not trust, like, or did you wrong. Going on, if your relationship with your friend’s boo-thang does not improve and it’s even getting worse – it’s maybe time to tell the BFF! She’s there for a reason, and that reason is to tell her everything you hate about her significant other – the way they treat her, how they flirt with other people, or even that they don’t like their dog. Either way, the key point to dealing with a significant other that you’re not fond with is to tell the key source – your best friend, because like I said, communication is the most important key to a relationship/friendship. It’ll be good on both ends. Maybe she’ll listen and things will turn out for the better! If not, at least you were the bigger person to solve a problem.
These three solutions on how to deal with your best friend’s significant other who you absolutely despise, will make your situation for the better, no matter what outcome you get. The most important thing is to remind yourself that if you’re receiving pushback from the SO or even your BFF, that in the end, you’re just looking out for someone, and all you want to give them is the happiness they deserve. And when you’re BFF realizes that, he or she will be thanking you.