Sororities. Some girls love them, some girls hate them. For me, a transfer student from a community college, I longed to be a part of a sisterhood at my new University. I transferred my Associate degree to the University of Utah and began my first semester on campus a few weeks before recruitment. I had been planning since January to attend recruitment and with September just a few weeks away I was practically counting down the days. I went to the pre-recruitment barbeques and meetings and really knew this was what I wanted to do. I was more excited than I have been in a very long time!
Recruitment finally came and after a weekend of meeting amazing girls and having some great (and mildly awkward conversations) I had my moment. The moment that every girl who is going through recruitment waits for. The moment you know which house is your house and which sisters are your sisters. I felt a warmth in my heart looking at the sisters in the room and I wanted so badly to be able to call them my own. I remember hugging the president as I exited the house on preference day and wanting so badly to be able to call her my sister.
I went to visit my parents that night excited to tell them about the weekend I had and the choice I had made but I soon realized they weren’t sharing the same excitement I had bursting inside of me. Although they were fully supportive of whatever decision I made, they made it known that they didn’t agree with the cost that would come with joining.
I fell asleep that night with calculations running through my head trying to figure out ways I could afford to make this amazing commitment. I had saved up the money earlier in the year specifically for sorority fees but because of a mistake I made in withdrawing from classes during summer semester I was out of luck. On the last day of recruitment, five minutes before the girls were scheduled to open their bids, I made my decision not to join a sorority and left. Just a few minutes later while walking to the library I heard the excited screams of hundreds of girls opening their bids and finally finding their place among their new sisters. That was not an easy moment for me.
It’s been a week since I had to decide and I’m still bouncing between relief and sadness. I feel like I’m going through withdrawals from my dream of being in a sisterhood and no one gets it. On the one hand, I am much more financially stable than I would have been had I joined and this has definitely relieved some stress. However, on the other hand, I’m missing out on a sisterhood which would have changed my time at the University of Utah.
When I made the decision I didn’t realize how much I really did long to be a part of the sorority I bid for. I wanted to be able to “throw what I know”, hang out with my sisters in the library, go to weekly Monday meetings and have sleepovers at the house. I thought after a couple days I wouldn’t really care anymore, but I was wrong. Who knows, maybe next year I’ll be happy with the decision I made but for right now it definitely still hurts.
I don’t know every girls situation and I’m sure I’m one of many who has gone through this experience. One thing that makes my case unique is that I’m a junior so I won’t be going through recruitment next year. If you’re a freshman or sophomore I highly recommend going through recruitment again and I met lots of girls at recruitment who were doing this! All I can say is listen to your heart and go with your gut because in the end is it really the money you remember or is it the memories you made?