I don’t know about you but pumpkin spice is hands down my favorite flavor. Other than the fact it tastes like fall / leaves / sweaters / football / flannels / caramel / Halloween and everything autumn ever, it brings in a spirit of the season like nothing else. But, browsing the aisles of grocery stores this year especially, I have been overwhelmed with the jaw dropping amount of pumpkin spice products from dog treats to cottage cheese to air freshener. I’ve been scared. Spooked even. Haunted by aromas of cinnamon, nutmeg, and bold orange lettering. Around every corner, in every section are products among products of pumpkin spice paraphernalia. Things that shouldn’t be pumpkin flavored. Things that shouldn’t even HAVE flavor. Things you cant even EAT. 2018 has been hit. The pumpkin spice plague is here, and I’ve compiled the worst of it.
- Salsa
Getting some Dia De Los Muertos vibes from this one.
- Kale The healthiest option of pumpkin spice perhaps?
- Dog Treats *smells treat* *licks treat* *shrugs* *feeds dog pumpkin spice treat*
- Deodorant Pumpkin spice latte deodorant… I’m sorry what?
- Protein Powder YOU HEAR THAT GYM RATS??? Like a pumpkin spice latte but for gains.
- Candy Corn Literally the most autumn appropriate product available for purchase.
- Costume “Pumpkin Spice” I think I just found the 6th spice girl.
- Breath Strips
The problem is, I think this might be worse than garlic or coffee breath.
- Almonds Pecan pie is probably super confused right now.
- Ice Cream Bars
Is it pumpkin? Is it yogurt? Is it ice cream? Is it pie? Is Trump really president? Huh?
- Pumpkin Seeds
Say pumpkin one more time Trader Joes. I dare you.
- Gum When Extra gum really just lives up to their name. #extraAF
- Cologne I like my men like I like my pie… sweet, rich, and in abundance.
- Vodka White girl wasted just reached a whole damn new level.
- Cough Drops
*gets sick on purpose*
- Cottage Cheese Who would have thought. Probiotic pumpkin.
- Spice Spray No this is not perfume, I promise. BUT it will turn any food into an automatic pumpkin spice product.
- Frosted Flakes Is it just me, or am I now misinterpreting Tony The Tiger as a pumpkin man.
- Pudding Not gonna lie, I’m intrigued.
- Face Mask *sticks face in pumpkin for free*
BRB… checking if I can change my major to pumpkin spice at this rate. But seriously, nothing screams America more than overdoing it… especially when it comes to holidays. In this case, pumpkin spice. The pumpkin spice season of your dreams or nightmares is now upon us. Dare I say, stay tuned for peppermint season ladies and gents.