Four days of infinite bliss
Four days that brought back those fireflies that found their way
Into my chest that night in the city
The night of lights and iron
The night that romance slid its finger down my back
Soft brown eyes that looked at me the way I haven’t been
Looked at in months and didn’t think would be looked at like again
The sure happiness I felt to be alive in that moment
To realize that this might be the absolute best day of my life
But you showed me four new ones
The softness of the subway train running across town just to touch me
Long glances and moonshine kisses that I thought were going to be our last
Gentle whispers of parting between concrete and streetlights
The words that lingered longer than those months apart
Saltwater taxi rides into the city at 4 am with baggy eyes drooping to my feet
I would’ve never thought airplanes would merge our two cities to find a space we could exist again
To be able to feel the softness again
To see the eyes that reassured me life isn’t so bad
That possibility is everywhere
That New York was and is the city
I anticipated it to be when I was fifteen
A place I can find the jar of fireflies hiding for me under the Brooklyn Bridge
A place of luminescent light and pipe dreams I ride on for miles
I want you to take the New York that’s scribbled on your left palm and wrap it
Around my neck
I want to breathe in the air of lilac sweat
I want my nails dragging down the skin of your back until blood breaks loose
I want your soft sulfur kisses
To hear the smacking noise of leather on skin
My wrists wrapped in red silk tied behind my head
To only have you in control
Wet kisses gently touching the soft skin of my neck that you turned into a shade between grape and plum
The marks you left behind for me to admire once you’re gone
Nights aren’t the same alone
I never told you how heavens can hurt me
But my hand reaches for a body to hold me closer when the clock hits 3 am
But I realize the number 1,970 lies in the blanket between us
Pushing your fingertips farther away from mine
I want to exist where you are
I want to live in the light and chaos
I want to breathe the iron and cement as it trickles through my clogged up throat
I miss the fireflies waiting for me in Brooklyn
I know they can’t wait forever- that their light will eventually implode
If I don’t get to them in time, I want them to remember we once, in space,
In time, in early June, existed together,
it was just us and the lights.