The Lost Art of Opening A Door

Let’s set the scene: The night is young, and the amber sun begins to set in a lilac honeycomb of clouds. The doorbell rings and your suave escort arrives at the door. You both make your way to the car. The defining moment has arrived. You stop at the passenger door, turning slightly to see your date clamber into the car like an ogre from the land of disappointment and failure. Absolutely not, you barbarian.

The reality of the situation is that this happens more often than not, or more so it happens regularly, people just prefer to turn a blind eye and normalize the negligence. Most things in life are permissible such as socks with sandals, 7:30 A.M. classes and pineapple on pizza. However, the incompetence to open a door bears no excuse. This is not an extravagant demand, no one expects to be sent lavish gifts or to be taken parasailing over the French Riviera. It is a door, literally an object, that someone has to open for another human being, a three second act, to show regard for another individual. This is not rocket science. Why is it such a foreign concept for others to grasp?

Sadly, it is not at all surprising. The common decency of generic boys have set the bar so low that it is routine to see a guy swagger into a car with no remorse for leaving the girl outside to grapple in herself. Most of the people I know predominantly assume to be disappointed every time a boy comes within 10 feet of a door because 95% of them are let down by their ape-like habits. Do not let this slide. If they don't open your door, call them out. Similar to dogs, boys need to be trained repetetively until it is ingrained in their memory. And no, this is not about a damsel in distress who cannot fend for herself and demands to be waited on hand and foot. Girls are capable. Why? It. Is. A. Door. You could train a gorilla to do it and they could.

To any sausage heads getting provoked reading this because the shoe fits, it’s not about the act but what it represents. The bottom line isn’t about being chivalrous; it is about being respectful. Would you not open your door for your mom? Your grandmother? It is mind blowing that some people can’t be courteous enough to have the most minimal of manners. You should be opening the door for others because it is the polite thing to do point-blank, especially if the other person is your date or significant other. I genuinely want to know what your thought process is behind the situation. Are you lazy? Is a door handle too heavy for you? Drink some raw eggs or go to the gym and get over your fragile ego, you heathens. Do you think people will make fun of you? “Wow, Chad over there is such a tool for opening the door for his girl. What an uncivilized human being.” Straight malarky.

And ladies, do not settle for an excuse of a human being who cannot even perform the simplest of gestures. If someone doesn’t open your door on a first date, or in any instance ever, it’s all over. Do not justify it or pretend that they don’t know any better, because they do. Everyone deserves to be treated with respect, or at the very least common decency, because every individual is capable of it. 

It’s ridiculous that we idolize individuals who do open doors in the first place. Don’t get me wrong, I want to personally high five any man or woman that I see opening up a door for their significant other or stranger, but this is a door people. Basic manners should not be put on a pedestal, yet the occurrences are so rare we applaud it regardless because it happens so few and far between.

Overall, I can’t stress enough the simplicity and severity of the situation when someone opens your door, especially a guy or significant other. Even though it shouldn’t be that big of a deal, it is, because at its core, it’s nonverbal communication as “Hey, I respect you.” ​If you feel guilty of this negligence (@ninety-nine percent of the dudes at my university), I would like to end by saying: Start somewhere by opening the door for your mom or family member or elderly person or at the very least; your dog.