We all have that person (or people) in our lives that just drags us down. When they’re around, it’s like all the life is sucked out of the air. They hurt you, make you sad, make you feel trapped, or make you feel other not fun feelings. These people are toxic to you and they’re not always easy to kick out of your life. But in order to be healthy and happy, it’s necessary to leave them behind and surround yourself with people you love.
Getting rid of toxic people in your life isn’t the easiest thing to do, especially if you are prone to feeling guilt over doing so like me. Ghosting is an easy method, where you stop replying to their messages or calls, block them on social media, and ignore them in public, but it’s not always the best. In some cases it can even make things worse, and can make you feel really mean. And a lot of the time the person won’t get the hint, leading you to an awkward in between state of them being in your life and you not wanting them to. So ghosting probably isn’t the best method if you want to get things over with fast.
The fastest way to cut a toxic person out of your life is to talk to them. This is definitely one of the hardest because the conversation can be awkward, or hurtful, and can dredge up a lot of pent up feelings. But if you want things over with quick so you can start building up your mental health again, this is the way to go. If it’s just a few behaviors of theirs that you don’t like or feel are harmful to you, and you still want them in your life but just not the way they are, talk to them about how you feel and see if they are willing to change. If they are, give them time to fix these habits before letting them back into your life. However, if you truly don’t want them in your life then tell them how they’ve hurt you and give them reasons for why you don’t want them in your life anymore. It’s going to hurt for a bit, for both you and them, but it’s better to get it over with and heal from there. They may even deny their actions, or flip it over so that they’re the victim, but it’s important to remember how they make you feel, and to stick to your points.
Another way to cut a toxic person out of your life is to slowly stop hanging out with them. It can be tough when they are in the same friend group as you, but the first step is to stop making plans with them. Start hanging out with your friends individually or a couple at a time, and avoid making too many group plans (especially if you’re in a group chat with them). Hanging out with new people that aren’t associated with your friend group can really help as well. When the group plans include your toxic person, you can make plans with new people as an excuse to avoid them, but also get in some social interaction. Eventually the person will expect to not hang out with you, and you can both blame it on growing apart. This method is a lot less painful as talking to the person, but it does take more time to do, so weigh your options carefully.
There are quite a few methods to cut a toxic person out of your life, and not every method can be the best option for you, but it is important to follow through with one of them when you have a toxic person in your life. It’s time to take care of yourself and in order to do so you need to surround yourself with people you love and who make you happy. If you try these methods out and they don’t work on your person, use ghosting as a last resort! It’s time to make a move to be your happiest and healthiest self.