As collegiettes, young adults, and just people, I am sure I can safely say we all have experienced some form of depression, anxiety, stress, etc. Positive mental health is definitely a struggle when we are juggling school, social lives with friends, boyfriends, family, our physical health, extra-curricular activities and much more. Some may be better at balancing certain aspects while others may struggle, and naturally so. And regardless of stress load, many suffer from mental illness that cannot be controlled whatsoever. There is no question that this period in our lives is one of the most difficult times we may face. Recently, the stigma of mental illness has been widely talked about on college campus. Articles speak on the importance of recognition and treating mental illness as what it is: an illness. I 100% agree with these articles, however, I would like to offer an important aspect that is necessary to help create a solution and that is self-awareness and mindset.
I want to be clear that in writing this, I am not discounting the importance of medication for mental illness, psychiatric therapy or counselor help, but I do want to add another side that is not often talked about which is what you can do for yourself. I live by the mantra that, “no one can make you happy except for you.” While it may not be a popular opinion, I do believe that we have some control over our thoughts and our mindset. Our friends, family, counselors, therapists and medication are all be necessary to helping us through difficult times in our life but we cannot just lie down and expect all of those things to raise us back up.
Everyday, we control our mood by our thoughts. As difficult as it can be, (and yes I know this from personal experience) we can choose to allow ourselves to lie in bed all day and think negatively, or we can attempt to surround ourselves with people and environments that can help to bring us up. Our thoughts and speech have so much influence over our attitude and perspective. If we are constantly thinking negatively and vocalizing to ourselves, friends and family negatively, then we will adopt that as a constant state. This does not mean that we should not be allowed to talk about mental illness with family, friends and especially counselors and therapists. It is important that we do. But, we should find time to attempt to focus our thoughts and speech on other aspects, as difficult as this may be.
When I was 16, I was put through an extremely difficult experience that was my definition of the “worst of times.” It completely altered who I was as a person and made me question what my purpose was after this experience. I completely cut off my friend group, left my dance team for 2 months and was not speaking to my parents unless absolutely necessary. I was no longer the happy, bubbly, overzealous teenager and I knew my friends and family were beyond the point of concern. Everyday was a struggle to get out of bed, to be around people and to move on. However, even after a few months with help from my parents, friends, counselors, etc., I realized I was still not happy because I was not internally making a change. There was no difference in my attitude, mindset or perspective and I hated being this unhappy. I started to reconnect with my friend group and am still extremely grateful for their immediate support when I did. I rejoined my dance team and started making conversation with my parents at dinner. Even on my hard days, I allowed my best friend to drag me out of bed and take me out. I could feel my overall happiness coming back when I was around people that made me happy. Maybe I did just need time or to let people help me. However, when I look back on that hard time in my life I do give myself the most credit for fighting/pushing through and making me happy.
At the end of the day, perspective is everything. It’s how you play the hand that you are dealt and while outside help is so important, we should strive to remember that our attitude can make all the difference in the world. I am in complete support of bringing mental illness to life but I do believe that at the end of the day, family, friends, doctors, counselors, therapists and even medication are not there 24/7 to support you. You have to be there for you and can either be your best friend or worst enemy.
Editor Note: This article is an opinion and story of the author alone and does not reflect the opinions, views, or experiences of Her Campus at the Univeristy of Utah, the University of Utah, or Her Campus Media.