I am a bit addicted to my phone. I use it in class. I look at it when I am alone in public as a crutch. I use it in uncomfortable social situations. I use it at work. It is the last thing I look at before bed and the first thing I see when I wake up. Going from Twitter to Instagram to Snapchat then Gmail to Youtube, Reddit, and Tinder then we go back to Twitter because surely there has to be new content by now. It is a vicious cycle. I am over it. I can feel the effects of this deeply in my day to day life. I am less motivated, less inspired, I feel worse about myself everyday and most importantly, I am wasting precious time, so I decided to stop feeling bad about myself and take a real break from this bullsh*t.
Photo courtesy of tenor.com
I have tried and failed at this many times, so I needed to get it down to a science. I deleted Instagram, Twitter and Snapchat. The goal is to go a week without checking up on these apps. To help keep myself busy, I made a list titled, “Sh*t you can do instead of looking at your phone.” It consisted of things I wanted to do, places I wanted to go, and basically anything to keep myself from checking my phone.
Photo courtesy of Allison Callahan
Initially, I did feel a bit lonely. I had to distract myself by going out and staying busy, but at the end of the day when I was alone, I was truly alone. I no longer had the option of connecting with people over the internet. I also could not seek the attention I felt I deserved anymore either. The internet has always been my platform for thoughts, and maybe that is why I was feeling so uninspired. A few likes on Twitter is not gratifying long term. I started writing in my journal almost every day during my hiatus. No one else could read it but me. It felt like I had a secret, and something about that was very pleasing to me.
My inspiration and motivation were heightened, I was not procrastinating. My confidence boosted because I had to force myself to go out, be social, and be myself. I could noy use my phone as a crutch anymore. How many organic connections have I missed in my life because I was too busy on my phone? I could not seek attention from my followers, and I did not have to compare myself to others. In the end, this took a lot of discipline, and for that I am proud of myself.
Towards the end of my week off, I was anxious at the thought of logging back in. I was just feeling so good about myself, and I was scared of spiraling down the rabbit hole again. Why exactly do these apps make us feel so sh*tty? I am not a popular influencer, I do not get hate comments every day. If anything, I get mostly positive attention, so then why do I feel like sh*t?
It has been five days since I logged back into my accounts. I noticed I did not miss out on much during my week off. Would I do this again? Absolutely. I think it is a great method for anyone who wants to come back down to earth. Writing this now feels a bit silly, but I think it is important to acknowledge that social media is designed to be addictive. It is okay to take a break and not be in the know at all times. Trust me, you are not missing out on anything.