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5 USC Products That Don’t Exist

One thing that is apparent after being on the USC campus for five minutes is that Trojans have a lot of school pride. University pride is a great thing, except for when it becomes gimmicky. We’ve all been to the USC Bookstore and seen the excessive amount of USC gear, and there are always those products that make you think, “Why?”


USC loves to use their brand to make money, which is smart for business. Therefore, I thought I would be helpful and make some suggestions for five possible products that EVERY USC student will want to buy.


Nikias Condoms

College students love casual hookups, and USC students love Nikias…so why not combine the two? Through a collaboration with Trojan Condoms USC can produce condoms with Nikias face on the wrapper to remind everyone to have school pride, even mid-hookup.


USC Themed Buttons

Know what is really trendy? Witty buttons! Whether you are putting them on your backpack or wearing them proudly on your shirt, fun buttons are a great way to express yourself. Collect ones that are relevant to you such as: “Proud to be a GDI”, “I Survived the Norovirus”, and “Parkside Darkside.”



USC Tampons

USC students bleed cardinal and gold, but us lady Trojans actually bleed cardinal. Tampons are already overpriced, so why not jack the price up with USC branding? With fun and festive USC wrappers, when your tampon inevitably falls out of your bag at least everyone will know that you are a woman on her period who goes to a prestigious university.


USC Cough Drops

What’s true for college students? They always seem to be sick with something. Whether it’s a cold, a cough, or the flu, there is always somebody sniffling in your class. Why not capitalize on the misfortune of students with USC themed cough drops? Make lozenges cardinal and gold so people can beat that cough like a Trojan!











Tommy Trojan Twinkly Lights

There are few things that basic girls love more than twinkly lights. So, Tommy Trojan shaped twinkly lights is something every girl will want to hang in their dorm, even if they are against the rules. Basic USC girl who loves her school and a good Tumblr aesthetic will go crazy for them.


All of these products will go flying off the shelves, because USC students love nothing more than to spend a ton of money on pointless USC products. And if you got all the way through this article, then you’ll know that I am being sarcastic because most USC gear is gimmicky. Fight On!

I am a freshman Communication major at the University of Southern California and a member of the Gamma Phi Beta sorority. Writing, Netflix, and Music are what my life consists of.
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