Sh*t URI Students Do

1.  Eat late-night iZone

You can’t end a night of  binge drinking without a calzone.

2.  Refer to each night by their associated bar

Monday-Breakers, Tuesday-Ocean Mist, Wednesday-Wheelhouse/Pancho’s, Thursdays-Bonvue, Friday-Charlie O’s

3.  Skip class to lay on the quad

Especially if there’s free Del’s

4.  Make a point to walk past the Wicked Good Kettle Corn stand for a free sample

Once is never enough

5.  Drink Iced Coffee in a hot cup

Rams run on Dunkin

6.  Park illegally

On the lawn, in the emporium, without a parking pass

7.  Smoke

Earning the nickname URhIgh

8.  People-watch in the 24-hr room

Has anyone ever successfully completed homework there?

9.  Darty

If it’s at least 45 degrees, someone is day drinking

10.  Pass judgement based on Greek affiliation

“You’re not in a sorority?  What do you do on the weekends?”

11.  Ride the ram outside the Union

And take a picture to document it

12.  Go to the bookstore to kill time

To peruse all of the over-priced apparell

13.  Live down the line

And brag about it to all your friends from home

14.  Instagram sunset pictures 

Can you blame us?

15.  Treat Greek Week like a national holiday

Class attendance/participation reaches an all time low

16.  Ride the RIPTA

Because someone built our campus on one big giant hill

17.  Complain about URI Secure

I. Can’t.

18.  Drink Razzbulls

Caffeine and sugar

19.  Take AVS 101

The easiest class offered at URI

20.  Hate on the football team

We only attend the Homecoming game for the tailgate

21.  Get misdiagnosed from Health Services

You have a stomach ache?  Here, have some codeine cough syrup.

22.  Submit a URI Crush

“As long as I have a face (insert name here) has a seat.”

23.  Ask “Hope or Butt”?

And know you’re talking about dining halls

24.  Go to T’s

Mostly for the homefries and cute coffee mugs

25.  Eat Butt Cream/Butt Nuggets

Delicioussssss

26.  Steal things from the dining halls

And smuggle them into your dorm room to snack on later

27.  Go to sh*tty Prov clubs freshman year

RIP Finnegan’s

28.  Buy groceries at Stop & Shop 

Awkward run-ins with someone you don’t want to talk to is sure to ensue

29.  Never get back a security deposit

Sorry Mom and Dad

30.  Learn the cut-throughs of Eastward to get to darties more efficiently

Can’t have the Gansett cops stop you with your plattys

31.  Get towed from The Emporium

Then pay over $100 cash to the sketchiest company in business

32.  Go to Newport for the St. Patty’s Day Parade

Not that you remember most of it

33.  Get something pierced at the top of campus

It’s a mistake

34.  Sabotage campus tours

*yells aggressively at tour guide*

35.  Get Orange Stickers

A sure sign of a good time

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