Colegiales, let’s congratulate ourselves for surfing the first weeks back to studying. It goes unsaid that we deserve a cold Medalla, Heineken or well… whatever you drink! Thanks to the friendly neighborhood bars, our first week was much better than we all expected. In honor of #SemanaDeProntuario, or Syllabus Week, most of the local bars decided to introduce themselves, much like professors make us do on the very first day of class. Here are some of the highlights:
“Hey people, I’m La Cuevita de Tarugos. I’m a prepa, jeje. My major is Mixology with a minor in Artisanal Pizzas. I’m known for always having lollipops on me in the middle of the jangueo and by perreo in dim lighting.”
2. La Bodeguita
“Hi, I’m La Bodeguita. I’m on my second year. I also major in Mixology with a minor in The Office. I stand out because of my watermelon juice and Beer Pong. #SemanaDeProntuario”
3. Piña Dulce
“Greetings, my name is Piña Dulce. I’m on my third year. I’m majoring in Mixology with a minor in Perreología. Something that makes me stand out are my #PiñaMondays with karaoke and rum at $1. #SemanaDeProntuario”
“What’s up? I’m called Downtown Plaza. I’m on my second year. My major is Mixology with a minor in Perreología and Discotek. I’m known by many for my yummy lunches and for my Quarter Wednesdays. I’m thinking about switching over to fichureo and advanced botelleo.”
5. Tijolos
“Kind greetings, my name is Tijolos, I’m on my third year with a major in exotic Mojitos with a touch of elegance, with a minor in guaynabichis/mayabichis. I stand out with my hot bartenders.”
6. Aljibe
“Hello, I’m Aljibe and my nickname is The House of Perreo. I’m on my fifth year. I have a double major in Perreología and Descontrol Noctuno with a minor in Mixology. I stand out with my 2×1, that makes you all so happy, and that you’ll do anything to perrear in my bar.”
7. El Garabato
“Good day, I’m Garabato, the dinosaurio colegial, the chicks’ father. I’ve hung out with your parents. I’m a salsa and perreo instructor, and I also teach a high-level class in dominoes. My dream is to continue educating your children’s children in desacato and certify them as pro drinkers.”
So, there you have it! These are only a handful of the bars that make up our “Mayagüez culture.” However, be sure to check them out on social media so you can see their happy hours for each day of the week. Then, you’ll be totally prepared to go out, unlike the test you’re gonna be taking by the end of the month.