Échale fuego prepitas, your time to burn bright has finally arrived! I know most of you are probably dazed with excitement, while others are lurking around with some sort of clandestine regret. For many, el RUM was the ultimate goal so congrats kiddies, you made it! Then there’s the other side of the moneda… those whose “high hopes” of leaving to the Land of the Free were crushed by relentless rejection letters or the typical Hispanic mom (“Ni loca te vas a estudiar fuera de esta isla, suerte tienes que te vas para Mayawest, ¡mal agradecida!”).
But hey, here you are. I suggest you get used to it ‘cause you’re here for a reason, and its nothing to be ashamed of. In fact, you should own up to it. Take it from the junior who spilled a glass of Chardonnay on her last pair of clean Seven jeans while writing the beginning of this article 1,600 miles away from home. Clearly she has it all figured out. Hashtag #sarcasm. Even in my third year, UPRM is a box of chocolates and there are a few inescapable prepadas that we all still commit (like showing up to a Bio lab in Sam Edelman sandals! Been there, done that, honey… several times). But don’t you worry, sarcasm is a language all its own, and if TV has’t taught you yet, Dr. Matthew Landers, our resident Cynic expert surely will.
Keep an open mind when the learning process begins; living by the handbook is no way to live, but that last chapter on body language and deceit, might come in handy in your next relationship. People talk about guns, but knowledge is authentically the best weapon against life. If you can wrap your ever-expanding mind around that concept, I promise you’ll get the education you deserve right here in little ol’ Mayagüez. If you’re extra clever, you’ll take every opportunity you see to get the hell outta’ here, too! Whether you’re trying to simultaneously lose and find yourself in the iridescent beams of a vintage disco ball hanging from the mirrored ceiling of Brooklyn’s snazziest after hours club… or you’re learning Italian in preparation for an internship or exchange program overseas, el Colegio can give you the tools to get there. Note I’m speaking from empirical experience (hashtag #psych-terms, you can google that one).
I know that sounds ironic, maybe even pretentious, but it’s possible. Your college experience is undoubtably the foundation for all your future endeavors, whether it be love, lust, or vice, moderation even in moderation; so make it count. I’m nowhere near figuring out the meaning of life or how the hell to apply the quadratic formula to my daily life, I also can’t promise you’ll fall in love with the campus, but he will do his damn dear best to seduce you. And who knows, maybe after an all-nighter and crazy night out with sick group of friend a la Ke$ha, you just might find out that you’re exactly where you belong. UPRM is the B-O-M-B and the opportunities that arise from just existing in this atmosphere are more than enough to help you figure out your own personal truth.