I’ve never really been a girl who goes out a lot, I have always prioritized my studies. I used to believe that the only way to succeed was to focus solely on academics, thinking that amazing grades would be the ultimate reward. I often found myself stuck in that mindset, telling myself things like “You can’t go to the movies; you have to stay back and study,” or “Don’t hang out with your friends today; you have an essay due soon.” I would end up torturing myself in front of a computer, leaving no room for fun or enjoyment, at least not until I completed my work.
One day, I decided to check out this movie called Booksmart. The movie is about these two studious best friends that are about to graduate high school and follows them on their search for the biggest party of the night after one of them realizes they could have been going to parties while studying and still succeed academically. It really inspired me because it showed how you can have a good time while still keeping up with your studies. Booksmart made me think about how I approach my schoolwork and having fun. To dig a little deeper, I asked my friends what they thought about my not-so-balanced work-fun balance. They said I focused too much on my studies and should try to find a balance, to also make sure to enjoy myself. They believed I was being way too hard on myself when it came to my studies.
At the time, it was easier said than done. My parents had high expectations for me, and I felt the pressure to focus solely on my studies. I didn’t want to disappoint them, so even though I wanted to join my friends and have fun, it was extremely difficult because their expectations were always in the back of my mind. My insecurities affected my ability to find a healthy balance between working hard and having fun. I often thought that my friends didn’t really want me to hang out with them, as if I were interrupting their time. By that point, I had become mostly a loner, making it challenging for me to communicate with others. However, I gradually overcame my need for my parents’ approval and my fear of being unimportant to my friends or not being noticed at all.
Nevertheless, I, at one point did slowly start to trust myself a bit more when it comes to having fun with my friends. I started accepting invitations, even if I was a nervous wreck. I was deeply afraid of seeming weird since I was not accustomed to being around people much. I’ll be honest, I don’t even know how I had friends in the first place, but they really made it easier on me when it came to creating the balance I needed between the two. Moreover, they would even study with me at times, as a way of not only doing something together, but also supporting me.
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There was also something I wanted to avoid while wanting to find a balance between studying and partying. It felt as if I needed to study constantly to be prepared for anything unexpected that could come my way. I worried that if I let myself have fun, all my efforts would go to waste. I allowed anxiety to take control, driven by the fear of being a failure. Nevertheless, I realized that if I never made time for enjoyment or took a break from what could lead me to success, my future, and overall life would not be enjoyable at all.
So here we are, and I have come to understand the value of having fun and the value it brings to life. I discovered many hobbies that I still practice and appreciate today. These experiences have helped me become a more well-rounded individual. I struggled to find a balance between fun and work for a long time, but I’ve managed to achieve it now.
Well, that said, it’s not always easy. Balancing studying and partying can be particularly challenging when you have a part-time job or are dealing with other external pressures (Don’t worry, I have experienced this firsthand). Nevertheless, at the end of the day, what truly matters is doing your best to focus on what you want and valuing the time you have, whether it’s spent having fun or not.