Picture this: it’s Thanksgiving and over 30 family members are roaming around the house, chattering about. Everyone has pulled over mismatched chairs to talk and each hand holds a glass of coquito. You only have to lean in a little at any angle to catch a snippet of any conversation with just about anyone nearby. Frankie Ruiz is playing in the background, and there’s chaos in the kitchen — the good kind, of course. It’s the kitchen that truly comes alive during family gatherings. And the best part? There isn’t a nook in the house where it doesn’t smell like arroz con gandules. There’s probably an aunt or parent running after someone with a plate, insisting on seconds. Love is expressed beyond words. Puerto Ricans say “te amo” to declare deep affection towards someone. But they also demonstrate it through a warm plate of food made with a lot of love. What happens in one family gathering echoes across the island, shaping Puerto Rican customs and relationships.
In Puerto Rico, after a night out — or simply as a gesture of courtesy — it’s customary to invite people over for a cup of coffee, sometimes accompanied by cheese or a slice of toast, regardless of the time of day. During Christmas, if someone has just been serenaded at their home, a parranda, the host, though they did not plan the serenade, will often offer asopao (rice soup from the island) and coffee as a gesture of gratitude. On the island, food is not just sustenance — it’s a way of showing care, hospitality, gratitude, and affection. It’s a medium through which Puerto Ricans nurture relationships, celebrate traditions, and affirm identity. Beyond big gatherings and traditions, love is also expressed in smaller moments — in the kitchen, through the careful making of family recipes.
Making flan, coquito, arroz con dulce, and tembleque with your family during the holidays is more than just cooking; it’s a bonding event where everyone gathers together and shares stories and laughter in the kitchen. Sneaky sips of coquito with a dash of rum and cutting up plantains to then make tostones, amarillitos, or mofongo are core memories within Puerto Rican families. These recipes are often passed down from generation to generation; therefore, each cooking process (and every bite!) carries the taste of nostalgia. Sharing these means sharing a piece of family history, sprinkled with cinnamon.
Not only are recipes kept as family heirlooms, but they also preserve heritage. Tembleque is linked to Puerto Rico’s colonial history, as Spanish, Taíno, and African culinary practices merged to create new dishes. The use of coconut was brought to the island with enslaved Africans, while the sugar was exploited during the Spanish colonial period. Coquito, often called Puerto Rican eggnog, reflects the island’s multicultural identity. It’s a fusion of coconut milk and rum, which were staples on the island. In fact, it was crowned as the best cocktail in the world, ranked #1 by Taste Atlas. Hot milk and wine drinks were popular with the Spanish colonists. The rum used in coquito is a local creation, distilled from the sugarcane that was a major part of the island’s colonial economy. This ingredient makes the beverage not only a cultural symbol, but also a product tied to Puerto Rico’s economic history. While they can be made any time of the year, these desserts are usually made for festivities, marking more significant moments during the holidays. For parties, you can ask others to bring side dishes like guineitos en escabeche, ensalada de coditos, ensalada de papa, and desserts like tembleque and arroz con dulce.
For Puerto Ricans in the diaspora — those who’ve had to leave the island — it’s important to find creative ways to enjoy the familiar flavors of home. During festive times, it’s common for families to send guineítos en escabeche and even cuerito relleno de arroz con gandules to their relatives in the United States through the mail, with a postal stamp of El Morro sealing the box.
No matter where Puerto Ricans find themselves — on the island or abroad — the flavors of home continue to unite families, preserve memories, and remind them that love can always be tasted. That second plate your aunt insists you take, the warm cortadito after a fulfilling dinner, and that sneaky, rum-filled sip of coquito your grandma slipped to you under the table — these are all manifestations of a Puerto Rican’s truest and purest form of love.