When does the touch of a lover blur into one of a coroner’s? A kiss can ravish until it bites and draws blood. A caress can press until it bruises. We sometimes love with so much force that we choke on it.
The concept of love being all-consuming, so much so that you become the consumer, is as old as sin. In fact, it even dates back to religious scriptures and traditions like the ancient Chinese practice of Ko Ku and Ko Kan and Catholic communion — some we still practice now. Loving someone to death reinvents itself in literature and film, constantly pushing the boundaries of what “‘till death do us apart” means.
Before we dive into cannibalism as an act of love in media, I find it important to preface by saying that I do not support cannibalism. I can barely eat red (animal) meat on a good day. However, I do believe there is something poetic, and even romantic, in loving someone so much you’d rather have them whole than not at all. To in life be their sanctuary, and in death be their tomb.
Our ancestors eating our ancestors
In “Eating your Lover’s Otherness,” Amy Henevald explains that the eaten heart is one of the oldest tropes in which cannibalism has romantic undertones. The legend tells the story of a man finding out about his wife’s lover, killing him, taking his heart, cooking it, and finally feeding it to her. It is often cited in medieval French literature, specifically found in Tristan and Yseut by Thomas of Britain. According to Heneveld, the story’s lesson is clear: “be true to your matrimonial vows and accept constraints on your desire or suffer the consequences.” The text, however, also “glorifies erotic love, through the sacrifice of the lovers.” While the meaning looms with the sexist control the husband has over his wife, the sacrifice of her lover eases the sting, as he stays with her, now forever.
Aside from romantic love, spiritual devotion also plays a huge part in the popularity of cannibalism as a metaphor, with the biggest culprit being catholicism. During the final moments of mass, the catholic congregation partakes in communion — the eating of Jesus’s body through bread and the drinking of his blood through wine. “Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood remains in me and I in him” (John 6:56).
For Catholics, there is no greater love than Christ giving them his being to eat, carry, and, quite literally, absorb. Every mass is an act of consuming. And, while they eat and drink, the pews of the church hold the pressure of grateful knees that partake in his last meal. This act, however, is not seen as cannibalism. How can it be, when the ‘body’ is wafers made by nuns and the ‘blood’ is wine squeezed from grapes? Because, to the congregation, the consuming of God is an act of devotion and love, not cannibalism; in a metaphorical way, if you will.
Us eating each other
As the Catholic church still exists, and medieval French literature is still studied, cannibalism as a sentiment of love remains alive and well. Unfortunately, it exists in a literal sense too, but my focus here is purely metaphorical… just in case.
In current media, cannibalism has been bleeding into pop culture and romance like never before. We see it from the resurgence of vampires to literal movies and songs that profess love by the biting of a lover. While I’d love to dive into vampires, and more specifically Twilight, the romanticization of vampires and drinking blood is different, considering you don’t necessarily have to die in the process. Still, the themes of love, death, and consuming one another share the same base as cannibalism.
The most prominent modern depiction of cannibalistic love, in my opinion, is through NBC’s Hannibal. The TV show is a reimagining of the character of Hannibal Lecter, a brilliant, handsome, rich, and cannibalistic man. However, instead of focusing on Lecter and Clarice Starling like in Silence of the Lambs, the series follows Will Graham, a criminal profiler for the FBI, who spends most of the show trying to catch the Chesapeake Ripper, who is, unbeknownst, Hannibal himself.
While the show is abundant in toxic themes of romance and dark violence, the love and obsession between the characters stems from a need to be each other’s everything. They quite literally cannot live without one another. Even their demise is falling to their deaths from a cliff in each other’s embrace. (Supposedly. I’m a post-cliff truther.) And although they never even kiss, Hannibal’s ultimate caress toward Will is through stabbing him in the stomach. While his lips do not leave an indent, the knife he wields carves a smiling scar into Will’s body; one that would never leave.
Hannibal never actually kills and consumes Will. Although attempts to murder each other are made, they’re both incapable of ever finishing the job. Their bond, however, is continuously reinforced whenever they eat human meat at dinner parties, kill victims together, and just embrace each other in their own twisted way. Their professions of love, however unconventional, show a devotion that is mesmerizing and numbing, leaving one to question the ethics of the whole ordeal.
Another incredibly famous depiction of love and cannibalism is Luca Guadagnino’s Bones and All. The movie follows the young couple Marren and Lee, who are both “eaters” (cannibals), and their eventual attempt at living a normal life. Their plan, however, is ruined when a character from their past, Sully, attacks them and fatally wounds Lee.
In the film, Marren does end up eating Lee after he asks her to do so. They truly do carry out the act of cannibalism as the ultimate expression of love. Although dead, Lee becomes one with Marren, finding himself useful to her even in his last breath.
To consume is to love
Cannibalism has always been, and always will be, used as a metaphor for love. The underlying theme of the matter is this one: loving unconditionally.
Besides the normal eroticism and passion implied by “eating” a lover, the appeal of cannibalism also rests in being willing to consume someone’s best and worst parts. To know someone would rather consume you instead of letting you rot speaks of a devotion that the majority of us can’t even begin to process.
Most human beings will always seek to be loved unconditionally. And what is more unconditional than someone being loved and devoted to, even after their death? Even from the perspective of the one being eaten, to provide for the one you love even after death can be a comfort.
Once again, I think it should go without saying that real cannibalism is horrible. We should not be eating other human beings if it is not for the sake of survival. (Don’t say you wouldn’t do it when you’ve never been alone, starving, and on the brink of death.) But to depict love metaphorically through it is beautiful.
So, with this article, I implore you to reconsider cannibalism. Take a chance, take a bite.