Threesomes are becoming kind of mainstream, but they usually get misunderstood. In fact, misconceptions on this topic can depend on a country’s politics, religion, ideology and education. Some people still feel like talking about a threesome is wrong. They believe that taking part in a threesome is only a sexual fantasy that some guys have. However, in other places it is actually normal to be with or marry more than just one woman or man.
Also, it will depend on the type of relationship you have and how open both parties are with this idea. Here are three solved taboos about threesomes within a relationship that we are used to hearing about.
- IT SHOULD BE WITH A WOMAN (NO, IT CAN BE WITH A MAN)
This is the sexual fantasy I was talking about, i.e. guys wanting a threesome only with a girl. Well, it turns out that a woman’s sexual fantasies can also include having a threesome with either a girl or a boy. If you’re thinking of trying this out, I suggest you first talk about it openly with your partner. Before doing so, be aware that your partner’s threesome fantasies may look different than your ideal scenario (for example: maybe your partner only wishes to try it out with another girl, or you only feel attracted to men). Whatever the outcome of the conversation may be, it’s incredibly important for the issue to be clear between you two. Then you may talk about fairness.
What is fair within this context? I’ll tell you: having the opportunity to have a threesome not only with a woman, but with a man, or with how many people you’d like. Remember you are doing it to please one another as partners. That being said, it’s essential to acknowledge that, even if you have a different sexual orientation you can take into consideration how your partner will feel and that you’re doing it together, so you can try to do it for him/her. Take turns!
- IT SHOULD BE WITH SOMEONE UNKNOWN (IT CAN BE A FRIEND)
Absolutely not! We are used to believing that it’s going to be better if the person that agrees to the idea is someone outside of your friends circle or someone who is single. Let me tell you it’s even better, depending on the type of relationship you have, if the person you choose to propose the idea to is someone whom you’ve known for a while and can trust.
Keep in mind that this way you can have a conversation beforehand and get to know what the third person thinks and feels about the idea and that person’s sexual attraction as well as desires. Also, you’ll always have an understandable response if at some point you feel uncomfortable and want to stop.
Lastly, remember that after this happens everything will be as cool as before. However, keep in mind that maybe if you’ve done it with someone unknown that won’t happen, and then you’ll be worried all around about what your partner is thinking of that person.
- IT WILL RUIN THE RELATIONSHIP (NOT NECESSARILY)
No, having a threesome will not necessarily ruin your relationship. That is why you should exchange ideas before doing it, including why it matters, what type of relationship you have, how much time you’ve been together and what are your goals as partners.
Take into consideration that you’re trying things together, not behind your backs, so maybe this sexual experience will strengthen your relationship. This happens when you are looking forward to being with a person for a long time and, instead of doing it alone, you prefer to do new things with the person you love, please her/him and get to know her/him even better.
Don’t be afraid to try new things, and always remember that what you both think and how you both feel matters more than anything else. If you don’t feel comfortable with your partner proposing the idea, talk about it, and don’t assume anything. If you said yes and at the time you don’t want to, also tell her/him. If you’re worried that something is gonna happen after it, feel free to talk about the topic as well. It’s all about communication, so make the most of it and enjoy the experience!