Disclaimer: Some of these examples are based off of my friend’s experiences. Thank you for your sacrifices.
The gym guy-
Cons: You know EXACTLY what I’m talking about. He loves the free weights more than he loves you. He works out a different body part each day of the week. Sunday is not a day off. He’s the guy planet fitness hates. Yes, he has a gallon of water next to him 24/7. Wants a meaningful tattoo. He rolls his eyes at you when you drink soda. Why’d you date him again?
Pros: He has the gym membership that allows a guest to come workout for free.
The guy from your hometown-
Cons: We all break up with him. Yes, your mom is still a little upset about it. She calls you every time she bumps into him at the grocery store. I can’t even detail his personality because I don’t remember him having much of one. Your moms are still friends on Facebook.
Pros: He still likes your pictures on Instagram.
The foreign guy-
Cons: Listen, we all do it, we all want to do it. Most girls want to date a foreign guy. He wears tighter jeans than you do and decorates his apartment with empty alcohol bottles.
Pros: He has a nice accent.
Bonus: Bonus points if he’s English. He also chain-smokes Marlboro midnights. Extra Bonus points if he loves to play FIFA. Super Extra Bonus points if he’s there on a golf/soccer scholarship.
The country/southern guy-
Cons: Maybe this is limited to southern colleges?? But almost all girls will date a very southern guy. He wears boots, makes you wear boots, hates your taste in music. The only jeans he has are bootcut.
Pros: Your new boots are comfortable and sometimes stylish.
The edgy guy-
Cons: You know he has a motorcycle and let’s be honest, that’s the main reason you’re together. You know your mom doesn’t want you to ride on one and that’s the whole reason you want to. He wears a leather jacket, probably smokes, you actually realize you know nothing about him except that. What was his middle name???
Pros: You guys can share eyeliner, but you probably shouldn’t.
The party guy-
Cons: You met him at a party, of course. Maybe he came with one of your friends or just showed up, but you rarely see him outside of the weekend and even when you do it’s still at a party. How is he in school? When does he do his homework?? You’ve never seen him without a beer. Has the same house decor as your foreign ex. He never invites you to anything that isn’t a party/”group hang.” He’s on at least 3 peoples Snapchat story every night.
Pros: You get invited to every good party by association.
The really smart guy-
Cons: He tells you he’s busy because he has to study for a test that’s in two weeks. He ditches your date night for a study group, he’s not sorry. He absolutely has glasses, sorry, he just does. He also totally 100% has khakis and wears them to every study group he schedules.
Pros: You never have to worry about him because you always know exactly where to find him.
The funny guy-
Cons: He has 10x more baggage than anyone would imagine. Everyone is his friend, even after you break up, your friends are still his friends. He is the class clown all the time, even when you don’t want him to be.
Pros: Everyone loves him, even if you don’t. So, you don’t have to feel bad when you dump him eventually.