What I Wish For My Younger Siblings

What I Wish For My Younger Siblings  

I am the oldest child. I can remember my younger brother being born 5 years after me. I had my time as an only child and I was beyond ready to be an older sibling. I wanted so badly to name my little brother Woody, but instead I got Jacob. I woke up one morning to find my parents' cars gone, and my grandmother’s car in the driveway. I knew instantly what was to come. At a mere 5 years old I had never experienced any kind of love like the love that filled my heart as I peered at my small, kind of ugly, little baby brother. I loved him so much, I didn’t trust myself to hold him because I just wanted to squeeze him. 

            A couple years later my sister was born. The excitement I had for a little sibling was long gone and to be honest, I didn’t care about having another.

In fact, I was disappointed in my parents. How could they want another child? Were my brother and I not enough? To make matters worse, I would have to compete with a smaller, cuter human being for my brothers affection. As cute as she was, she was also super weird. For a good majority of my sister's life we ignored one another. Allison was very close with my brother, as was I, but we did not communicate more than necessary. It wasn’t until we embarked on a five week long cross country camping trip that I realized she wasn’t so bad!

Soon after, she began to dance at my studio. We never did dance together, but she soon developed the same passion for dance that I had (and still have today)! Although I graduated and went to school, Allie pursued competitive dance, just as I had when I was her age. I found myself living vicariously through her, and we even have a competitive duo this dance season! 

            Both my siblings today have become my best friends. We have traveled places, shared experiences, and grown together so much more than I could ever have expected. Although we may not have started out as best buds, we certainly have become loyal friends to one another. I count on them, despite being the oldest, and they support and love me just the same. As we age, we become even more cohesive. I often find myself wondering how I got so lucky as to have two younger siblings that act as my older siblings, friends, supporters and fans, and even parents at times. I can only hope I am the same person for them as they are to me. 

            I wish more than that for them. I want them to be treated the way they deserve, by all their friends and partners. I wish them the best of luck in all their academic endeavors, no matter what those may turn out to be. I hope they find success and happiness in what they love to do, I hope they find support from those around them while pursuing these things. I hope they learn the most from hardships instead of becoming bitter over them. I hope they find peace after pain. I hope they love without fear, over and over, despite the outcomes of previous relationships with friends, peers, and partners. I hope they never face the hopelessness of confusion, and instead fight for clarity, no matter the situation. I hope they always feel support and love radiating from our parents, me, and the rest of our large family. I hope they both find appreciation for their life lessons and obstacles. I hope they find the happiness I have found, and I hope they can share it with me someday. 

 

To my siblings, I love you, I have always loved you, and I will always love you. 

Xoxo,

Sissy