My mom is the strongest person I know. I have watched my mom, over the years, experience more loss than a person should ever face at such a young age. I have seen first hand how my mother has overcome some of the most horrible things in life, like losing a child, losing her mother, and losing two of her best friends. Although I really don’t remember the first two since I was one and a half and three respectively, I do know that all these deaths came with a lifetime of hurt. But, my mom took this and turned it into a lifetime of strength. She grew from all the pain, and although it was all still there, she continued to push forward and be strong not only for herself but for everyone around her. She was truly selfless in the act of comforting others for a loss she was grieving and always made sure everyone was okay.
For my entire life, my mom had been trying her best to help me and my siblings grow up to be strong. But at any moment I still remember clear as day, when looking back, I can pinpoint when my strength really began to kick in. One day in particular was in the fifth grade. At my school, when you’re in fourth grade, you were paired with a kindergarten buddy. You did activities with them during school, sat with them at assemblies, and just had a little partner to look out for at school. My little partner’s name was Meghan. She was the cutest, full of life in little kindergarten, who loved crafts but was way more shy than I was. After that year, I didn’t get to see much of Meghan, but I still knew that she was growing and learning in the first grade in the building next to mine. Until one day I got home from school. My mom was odd and quieter than usual. She pulled out the ‘2006 Our Lady of the Lake School’ yearbook and showed me a picture of the previous year’s kindergarten class. She asked if I knew any of them and I was of course ecstatic to talk about my kindergarten buddy Meghan, which made what my mom had to say next probably twice as difficult. The night before Meghan and her sister Kelly were drowned in the tub by their father who then hung himself. How do you tell this to a 10-year-old? How do you explain death, murder, and suicide to someone who still just wants to play ‘Pretty, Pretty Princess’? My mom was strong. My mom had to have one of the first of many really serious conversations with me that day. Neither of us were prepared, neither of us really understood, but both of us knew we had each other to lean on.
As the years have gone by, we have both experienced loss and struggles. Although not every situation is as difficult to wrap your head around as the death of Meghan and Kelly, we still knew we’d always be there for each other and continue to help build each other’s strength. My mom was strong for me during breakups and stressful weeks at college I didn’t think I could get through. But she taught me to be strong on my own too so there are now things I can handle on my own. My mom embodies the quote: “Here’s to strong women. May we know them. May we be them. May we raise them.” She is strong for others even when she struggles to be strong for herself, and that’s the best part about being older: now my mom can lean on me too. And although Liam, Nanny, Wayne, and Bob may not be here anymore, I know for a fact they are proud of you, the strength you have, and the strength you give others. Thank you for being my hero, my rock, and my strength.