Put on your yarmulke it’s time for Hanukkah! For those of you spinning your Jewish Dradle, eating your body weight in Gelt (those cute coin shaped chocolates we all love so much!) and unwrapping gifts for eight days straight- congrats, you’ve officially earned our jealousy. After we found out how many Jewish hotties there were out there we almost converted, but then decided that we would just write about it instead of spending our weekends studying the Torah in whatever the Jewish verion of CCD is! Here’s a Hanukkah gift that keeps on giving! Because at the end of the day when you’re about to blow out another candle of the Menorah and open another present, unwrapping an iphone cool but scrolling down a page covered in famous babes is HOT!
Drake- He’s come such a long way since wheelchair Jimmy in Degrassi. It’s nearly impossible to watch Rihanna’s “What’s My Name?” video without having not-so-secret fantasies that you could kick Rih Rih right out the vid and have this Jewish hottie whisper in your ear. We’re still waiting for the newest Hanukkah rap…
Adam Levine- Although he is yet to come out with an album of Hanukkah carols, we ain’t mad. Adam is burning up faster than the candles of the Menorah even when he’s rocking the bed-head fohawk. If we weren’t already jealous enough of the Victoria’s Secret models the fact that Anne Vyalitsyna got to go home with our Jewish crush made us more envious than we even knew we could be!
Jake Gyllennhaal- What’s sexier than a man who’s willing to strut his nearly-naked stuff on the big screen? We couldn’t think of anything either! Maybe we were so confused during Donnie Darko because we were too busy wondering who this unknown hottie was! If he’s really dating Rashida Jones we hope that end’s soon because we’re next in line to play spin the Dradel with Jake!
Shia LaBeouf- I urge you to get the image of Shia LaBeouf as Louis in Even Stevens or Stanley Yelnats in Holes out of your head and fast-forward straight to the smoking hot roles hes played in Disturbia and Eagle Eye. If you’ve wanted to spend some quality alone time with Shia ever since he got the churro machine in his Even Stevens bedroom, you’re not alone. He’s sure you impress Nonna with his dashing good looks and crack a joke with your little. There’s no doubt about it this Jew is a total keeper!
James Franco- The fact that James Franco actually had us running to the box office to buy tickets for a movie called Rise of the Planet of the Apes was an accomplishment in itsself and it’s safe to say we weren’t drooling over the apes. Heck, he was even hot as the drug dealer/bff in Pineapple Express. His bad boy influence leaves us hoping skip the traditional Latkeys this year and sneak upstairs for a game of naked Dradle with Spider man’s nemisis!
Daniel Radcliffe- Nothing hotter than a sexy Bristish accent like out boy Daniel’s! Although his bowl cut and round wire glasses don’t top the charts of our hottie qualifications, we haven’t stopped buying midnight tickets to his movies since day one! When Hogwarts decides to offer my major i’ll be first on the transfer waiting list and until then you can find me practicing enchantment spells for Danny…
Adam Brody- Although this hottie celebrated “Christmakah” on the popular TV show the O.C. (RIP) he’s lighting a Menorah rather than a Christmas tree during his real-life holiday celebrations. Earning his fame as the nerdy teenager that spent more time with Captain Oats and his comic book collection than his did with Summer Roberts he won the love of our teenage hearts as the sexiest geek we’ve ever seen.
Andy Cohen- Although Andy Cohen is Gay, he makes our list of Jewish hotties because he never fails to start our week of right with a heavy laugh sesh on his popular TV show Watch What Happens Live. Who wouldn’t want a hot gubby (gay hubby) like Andy to gossip about The Real Housewives with?