Calling all Millennials!
If there is one book I could recommend to ANYONE in their twenties, it is the Defining Decade. Even if you are not a big reader, I promise this will help you in so many aspects of your life.
Our twenties are crazy; most can agree on that. We’re going to college, graduating college, looking for jobs, deciding on careers, working through relationships with friends and romantic partners and just learning how to live as an adult. It is the first time in your life where you’re expected to have it all together, when in reality that is the last thing you have.
This book, written by Meg Jay who specializes in clinical psychology and adult development, goes through the many trials and tribulations we are thrown into as we reach our second decade of life. And if you’re expecting a cliche book full of “carpe diem” sentences, that is NOT what this is. It makes you gain perspective, think about who you are and your life in a brand new way, and motivates you to actually get your life together during the time where you still can. It doesn’t sugarcoat your twenties and most definitely doesn’t tell you to just “self-explore”, ignoring any responsibility you may have. It gives you the confidence you need, pinpointing your frights and makes you feel like it is speaking directly towards you.
“The Defining Decade is the book twenty-somethings have been waiting for. It will not tell you what you should do with your life, but it will inspire, motivate, and educate you to figure it out.” – Rachel Simmons, author of The Good Girl
We are the generation that is usually dismissed, ignored and spoken down to, which is the reasoning behind our “thirty-is-the-new-twenty” attitude. We are learning from the “baby boomers” who started their family and careers early on, and are bombarded with the myth that a career is important and family can wait. This causes us to push all responsibility to our thirties and so we have our twenties to mess around and burn too many bridges to success. Through relatable stories, this book shows that we need to use this decade wisely. Work, relationships, personality, social networks, identity, and even the brain change more than ever during this time and we can not ignore it. With success and revelation during this decade, you will learn the tools and skill sets to be successful in the years to come.
It starts with a chapter on tips and advice for the working world and identity capital, the myth that Facebook shows the reality of everyone’s lives, and the benefits of weak ties. It then moves onto the informative chapter of love, which focuses on the topic of “dating down”, comparing “deal breakers vs. match makers”, picking your family and the effects of cohabitation. You’ll definitely not only look at the partners you’ve chosen, but look at why you have because of the self-reflection that will undoubtedly take place. Ending with the highly interesting chapter on the brain and body, you will learn how to work through stress and how this is the time in your life when you should be learning about yourself and HOW you work so you can be the best you can be in all aspects of life.
I am forever grateful for this book because these are all the things twenty-somethings NEED to know but no one is talking about. If you want to do well in your thirties, you need to work hard and persevere through the challenges of your 20s. Yes, it may be scary, but isn’t everything that’s exciting and new? Every great thing starts out a little scary. Your anxieties are played out in this book in the best and most comforting way possible. This book is impactful and insightful. My copy is saturated with highlights and ink and I know it will be something I can look back on in the future.
The Defining Decade isn’t talking at you, isn’t telling you what to do and where you should be in your life, but it is making you realize you are not alone. Every other twenty something has these questions and fears of the decade that is quickly developing their lives. Your twenties are happening; they are not stopping as they are the time to find yourself and diligently become the hard-working person you can be.