John Mulaney is a stand-up comedian and former Saturday Night Live [SNL] writer. He’s also the love of my life.
Just kidding on that last one. But seriously, Mulaney is a hilarious guy and if you’ve never seen or heard his specials on Netflix or Spotify, I urge you to check him out. SNL fans might remember that he and Bill Hader are the people who come up with the hilarious Weekend Update character “Stefon.”
One of the best things about Mulaney is that he’s so relatable. Hearing him talk is like hearing an anecdote from an old friend. I would love to meet him and just ask him about his day because he can make normal, day-to-day occurrences seem like the funniest things in the world.
Now, next in my “As Told By” series: Spring Break as Told by John Mulaney.
The last class before break starts:
Our professors know they’ve been working us hard. They can see it in the dull, glassy-eyed stares we’ve been giving them for days. Midterms have worn us out, and we could all use the time off. Trust me, professors need a break as much as we do right now.
Catching up on all the shows you missed during the semester:
One of John’s favorite shows is Law & Order: Special Victims Unit [SVU]. This break is the perfect time to binge SVU and see what the detectives are up to. Ah, Ice-T, it’s been a while…
Going back home and doing absolutely nothing:
Sure, going out is fun. Do you know what’s even better than going out? Doing nothing! I plan on meeting up with some of my friends during my week off, but you will definitely catch me chilling at home with my dogs, a bag of popcorn and Ghostbusters (now streaming on Netflix!) — which I’ll watch when I need a break from SVU.
If you’re visiting family, TREAT YO SELF to a home cooked meal:
Who cares about beach bodies? Spring break means extra portions of Mom’s famous lasagna. Go on, have another piece. I’m not judging — because I’m on my second dessert.
Or, if you want to splurge even more, go out to eat with family and friends. Gotta get a plate of fries for the table.
If you’re visiting New York City, remember that you can’t get lost:
In one of my personal favorite bits, John pokes fun of Home Alone 2: Lost in New York because getting lost in New York should be hypothetically impossible — the streets are numbered, after all. Here is John’s sage advice to tourists visiting New York: “Where you at? 24th and 5th? Where you wanna go? 35th and 6th? 11 up and 1 over.”
Have a fun and safe spring break everyone! Don’t forget to relax–you deserve it.
Bonus: Can you sleep all of spring break?