It’s the end of the first semester, and bae is NOT bae anymore. Your drunken choice at a party you don’t remember is not worth what you thought he was. You’d rather stay at home alone rather than head over to his room that reeks of cheap cologne. The pizazz has worn off. Time to face it, the last time you got butterflies in your stomach was when you saw chocolate and ice cream half off at Target.
So now you’ve decided to end your first college relationship– you’ve got to do it. Here’s some advice on how to get it done:
1. Don’t be that person who breaks up over text.
Do onto others as you would have others do to you.
2. Plan the location.
This can be a coffee shop or just the next time you’re hanging out at his place. I suggest breaking up at his place so you can be the one to leave. Kicking him out at the end is just more awkward than it needs to be.
3. Make a few bullet points on what to say.
Cut straight to the meat of the matter. After you both sit down, just say it: “We need to talk. I want to break up.” “It’s not you, it’s me” is so overdone you might as well say “It’s not me, it’s you” (if you go for the latter, let me know how it goes!)
The Explanation
If you’re lucky, the conversation ends there and he just leaves. Usually, an explanation is required. Here, it’s a good idea to stick to the classics: “it’s not working out,” “I’m not happy, and I don’t think you are,” and “I don’t want this anymore.”
The Fight
He may want to salvage the relationship. Stand. Your. Ground. If you weren’t happy in the first place, then you won’t be happy in the second (bad joke, #notsorry). Promises of change never last and you deserve better. They deserve better.
4. Be prepared for his reaction.
No, he’s not going to cry (probably). There’s a good chance he wants to end it, too. A lot of this depends on how well you know him. He may fight or he may simply walk away, and text you later.
5. Beware of post-breakup texts.
DO NOT RESPOND… unless you are going to do something sassy and then submit it to Ellen. Otherwise, go ahead and block that number.
6. Take some time for yourself.
You just went through a breakup, too. It’s not wrong to feel sad that the relationship is over. Grab a movie, a facemask, some ice cream, and a good friend to recover.
7. DON’T FEEL GUILTY!!!
The relationship didn’t work out. That’s not your fault. If it was supposed to last forever, it would have. If he’s upset, that’s not your fault either. You ended a relationship that was damaging more than it was empowering. You have to cut that toxic sh*t out.
8. (Optional) Look D*MN good every day for a month wherever you might see him.
[Photos Courtesy of Giphy.com]