Imagine coming home after a fun-filled second date with someone you admire. You shoot them a text asking if they got home safely. No response. You get a little anxious, but it’s fine. You think that maybe they didn’t get the notification, so you send them another text reminding them of how much fun you had and that you’re looking forward to meeting up again soon. Once again, you get no response. Days pass and you’ve already made every excuse as to why they haven’t responded to you yet. They’re definitely not dead though, they just posted on their Instagram. Yikes.
This is a bit too familiar for a lot of people who are venturing into online dating. Sadly, ghosting is one of the easiest things to do. Don’t lie, almost everyone has ghosted someone before. I’ve even had my unfair shares, and karma hit me extremely hard. The main reason this article is being written is to put my a** in check. You too.
It’s quite literally haunting
And not in the cute Casper way. When you get hit with a ghost, you’re left with utter confusion, searching for all the answers as to why it might’ve happened. When you don’t find the answers, you then get angry and then you blame yourself. A never ending cycle, ghosting becomes a legitimate fear for future relationships and nobody wants to go through that. This goes for friendships, co-workers, potential partners — whoever you found a connection with or relied on, them suddenly disappearing messes you up. Until you get a valid reason as to why they went AWOL, you’re just left pondering.
Better your communication
Or in more brutal words, grow up. Being completely honest is a better way to break it to someone that you’re not interested, rather than ghosting them and leaving them questioning what they did wrong. It’s better you tell them why things weren’t working out instead of leaving them hanging. It’s common decency to end something face to face instead of ghosting, and you’re literally making it worse for yourself, as well.
Karma? She’ll come
I’m not going to lie, your girl has ghosted people many times. Some for valid reasons though. However, just recently I was talking to a guy. Nothing major, we were sending small texts here and there. I was hoping it would evolve into us eventually hanging out. That was instantly shot down, though, after he stopped texting me out of nowhere. I kind of laughed ‘cause I thought he was just busy, but his Instagram stories said differently. Being ghosted for the first time really put my guard up, even though it wasn’t that deep between us. I think I was mainly upset because he was really attractive and could cook. Oh well!
Ghosting will never go away, though
Sadly, we all know that ghosting will probably never go away. But that doesn’t mean we can’t teach ourselves to avoid or move past it..
And to the person who’s planning on ghosting someone (how weird of you to plan a ghosting, like it’s scheduled into your planner), sending a sentence saying anything doesn’t hurt. It can save you and them the trouble and confusion attached to ghosting. A simple, “I had a fun time with you, but I don’t think we should continue going any further… (with reasoning). Take care!” That wasn’t hard right?