Why That Bath Bomb Isn’t Working

You are reading this article for one of the following reasons. This title is ridiculous and you are a curious cat, that one bath bomb never seems to go all the way and you want answers or probably because you thought, “OMG she knows why I’m not all better after like 25 bath bombs and a weekend of alone time.” I have good news and bad news. Good news is I can tell you the answer to the last one and satisfy some of your curiosity but the bad news is I have no idea why that bath bomb won’t work all the way- sorry girlie.

Look we all hear about the weekend for ourselves where we pack on face masks, sit in bath bombs and read. So, I went and tried it. I spent two whole weekends soaking in bath bombs, reading, watching shows and doing my nails. It did not work.

I was so severely burned out collegiettes - I was dying. I couldn’t see what I was doing. This is because the bath bomb is sex and what you need is the emotional connection.

I know that's the weirdest thing you ever read. Let me explain myself. We all love a guy or girl who can make us feel good for the night. It's natural. The bath bomb is that boy or girl. But we don't want that boy or girl all the damn time. We need to have love. And that love won’t be found in sex or in this case bath bombs and candles. This love can be found only in yourself.

So how do we find that love that will bring us back in time for finals and tests? Well, I learned that Ariana Grande is a nice place to start. I recommend singing “Why Try” in the shower to yourself.

Remind yourself that you are the person you must love regardless. Then, I recommend asking yourself some deep questions. You can have an open conversation, talk out loud or make a voice note. Some questions I recommend are: If you could pick three memes to describe how you feel right now what would they be? Then ask yourself why those three. Name three people you spend the most time with and ask yourself, “how do these three people affect you?” Learn yourself. We are so complicated. It's idiocy to think we could solve all of our problems with a bath bomb.

Date yourself. Eat food and talk to yourself. Ask yourself questions you would ask your date. Favorite color and why. Favorite food and why? Memories? What hurts? We are infinite. And we need more than weekends to fix ourselves. Give yourself an hour every day to talk out how you feel. You are not some machine that only needs oiling once a week or every two months collegiette. You are human and you are needy - pun intended.