Growing up as a woman of color is tough. It means that I have to deal with the challenges of not just being a woman, but the challenges of being a person of color in a society that worships Eurocentric beauty standards.
One look at me and you can tell that I do not meet the Eurocentric definition of beauty. Does this mean I’m not beautiful? This has been a personal battle I’ve had with myself while growing up. I used to see multiple advertisements by companies such as Dove, which claimed that skin brightening and whitening products would make you look more beautiful. This definitely did take a toll on my self-esteem. Furthermore, I never saw girls that looked like me being represented in the media. This made me feel that only European features were the epitome of beauty. However, I now understand that I was simply brainwashed into thinking that.
As a teenager, there would often be times I’d catch myself looking in the mirror and wishing my nose and lips were smaller. Getting rude comments from family and friends (even if it was said in a joking manner) about the way I looked definitely made me feel more insecure. I remember the endless hours I spent on the internet googling ways to make my nose smaller, but to no avail. I spent most of my teenage years not fully expressing myself due to the lack of confidence that stemmed from my insecurity.
Looking back, I definitely regret spending so much time trying to achieve those unrealistic and unhealthy beauty standards. There is beauty in individuality and I should be grateful for having a healthy, functioning body. I’ve started treating myself with love and compassion and whenever I find myself pointing out my “flaws,” I quickly correct myself. Self-love, no matter physical or mental, takes practice. There are days where I love the way I look but there are also other days where I don’t even feel like leaving the house because of the way I perceive myself. However, it is important to remember that occasional slip ups are part of the learning process, and it just means you need to find more ways to boost your self-esteem.
Some ways I’ve tried to reaffirm that I’m beautiful despite not meeting Eurocentric beauty standards include having a Pinterest board with women who are similar to me, having photoshoots to boost my self-esteem and journaling whenever I think about of feature of mine that I am insecure about and following it with reasons why that feature is actually beautiful.
Today, I can confidently say I’ve learned to embrace my melanin and my other non-Eurocentric features. I love the way my skin glows in the sun. I am thankful for my nose for allowing me to smell all the LUSH Cosmetic bath bombs. With a little practice, I hope you’ll love yourself too, despite what Eurocentric beauty standards might say.