What exactly is a friend? When it comes to this topic, most of us generally know what’s expected of us: honesty, loyalty, support and love. But the truth is, none of us are perfect in demonstrating these things to those around us. Over time, I’ve learned that lasting friendships require work. Although it might be hard to admit, we could all use some improvement. Here are a few tips I came up with that will help you get started – some of these may seem obvious, but they go a long way.
- A good friend communicates with you.
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If you want to make your friendship worthwhile for both parties, this is really important. Please check in on your friends. Text them once in a while to see what they’re up to. I know life is stressful, but no one is ever truly too busy to send a quick text. I mean, we have our phones with us 24/7. I have some amazing friends who I haven’t seen in a long time because they live so far away, but we still make an effort to text each other at least once every two weeks to say “Hey I love you! How are things going?” Even if we don’t text, I know that they’re still thinking of me when they do simple things like tag me in posts that remind them of me. A little effort truly goes a long way.
- A good friend listens to you.
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This is essential. It’s important to listen to your friends when they’re having a bad day or even a good one. It’s important to remember that your friend loves white chocolate or is allergic to cats. Personally, I get a warm feeling when someone remembers little details about me. I love being asked, “How was your doctor appointment yesterday?” or “How did your test go?” as it makes me feel like I’m important to someone. Moreover, it’s important to listen to a friend when they’re going through a hard time and need to talk to somebody. The best thing that anyone has ever said to me when I was going through heartbreak was, “I’m not going to let you go through this pain alone. I love you and I’m here for you,” and it meant the WORLD to me. Genuinely being there for people makes them feel valued and important.
- A good friend appreciates you.
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We’ve all, at one point, found ourselves in a situation where we invested a lot of time and effort into being a good friend to somebody and they didn’t reciprocate that same energy. Being appreciative of someone means that you let them know how grateful you are for them and how much you value them in your life. Trust me, it sucks to be taken for granted.
- A good friend supports you.
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I really admire those in my life who take the time out of their day to lift me up and support me. I love it when people swipe up on my stories and provide encouragement or when they text me saying “I’m proud of you” after I’ve accomplished something. Tiny gestures like that mean so much to people. But most importantly, we can each show our support by taking it a step further: through our actions. We can do this by showing up and being present for our friends! Support your friends’ businesses, check out their projects, attend their events, etc. It’s important to show people that you have their back no matter what.
Friendship is definitely a two-way street. Often, we expect to receive a little more than what we’re willing to give. However, it’s important to know how those around you need to be loved and cared for. I hope you can apply some of these tips in your relationships so that both parties can remain happy and work towards the common goal of building something that is long-lasting and worthwhile.