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Keep Irrelevant People Out of Your Life

Photo By Jerry Kiesewetter


Self-acceptance and self-validation are two major keys to success (not sure if this is confirmed by DJ Khaled) and when you have those two things you are setting yourself onto a fruitful path to success.


Opinions are like ounces of water. Everyone must have at least one. It does not have to be for a specific topic, but somewhere down the line in life you become passionate or knowledgeable about something and you have in your mind what you think is right and how to fix it. It is not that simple when people form other opinions of other people. Actually, it is.


People can have opinions of you. Anyone can have any opinion about you, from your parents all the way down to a random person in a foreign country that you have never been to. The key is choosing whose opinions matter to you and keeping that number very small.


I once had a manager during my senior year of high school tell me that him and the rest of the staff felt as if I was a “Debbie Downer.” I was crushed for two reasons: I really needed that job and I thought I was getting along pretty well flipping and cutting ice-cream.


So, I begged for my job back (I was fired for being a “Debbie Downer”) and after I got my job back I quit because I realized he wanted me gone no matter what and I did not want my butterfly presence anywhere where it was not THOROUGHLY appreciated.


There was no use in explaining my crippling social anxiety or my depression to someone who wanted me to be a cheerleader instead of an employee. I validated myself and I accepted myself even with the things that I could not help and left that toxic environment


Currently, this so called “Debbie Downer” is attending the University of Kentucky and writing for the best online women’s magazine that this world has to offer.


I say all of this to say that if you have people whose opinion of you are doing more hurt than constructing you into a better you, drop them and make them irrelevant. Begin this new form of self-care by categorizing irrelevant people as irrelevant and keeping them that way.


Love yourself enough to appreciate and seek your own validation and acceptance.


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