Friends, the one thing is that there is never an age for us to begin to learn a valuable life lesson. The more we experience heartbreak or tragic events, we are able to come to terms with who we are. One of our first experiences, as human beings, is the feeling of bonding. It is a familiar feeling which is instinctive to us and comes from the feeling of love. We crave that feeling because it is necessary for our survival. In order to succeed in life, we need to be able to form sufficiently close relationships with others. Outside of our family unit, the people who become like family are our friends.
Friendships are often misunderstood by many people, and the value of it is taken for granted. So, why bother? It obviously takes plenty of wisdom to know who appears to be a potentially good friend. Friendship knows no boundaries, and it comes with no requirements other than to be understood and to have someone to create memories with.
There are some reasons why friendship is important:
1. They help bring down your walls.
You know that feeling when someone describes something they have gone through which you have never been able to articulate? You feel a sense of relief, and suddenly you don’t feel as lonely as before. At first, you have the instinctive feeling to brush away this person, you don’t want to let them in just yet. You start to remember memories that have shaped who you are as a person, but you have buried deep inside. You start to see yourself as human just like everyone else, someone who has been hurt before and should not feel ashamed or regret. You find the courage to become vulnerable and safe to express yourself.
2. They are patient and take time to understand why you are the way you are. This means remaining your friend even when they have seen you at your worst.
No one will ever show you who they really are until you search hard enough to find the truth. Friendships are not meant to be about arguing or having to feel like you always have to be right. Patience means waiting to understand both sides of the story. If you sense that you are going to be called out on something, don’t take it the wrong way. It simply means your friend cares enough to try to fix a situation. Be patient for the things that are worthwhile. Though your friend could be upset at your behavior, as long as you are able to reflect, and act upon changing that is all that matters.
3. They create memories that last a lifetime.
You know how things are when you are by yourself. You go to classes, do your work, go watch a Netflix series, and then you go on social media etc. Life becomes predictable. As for my friends, we all have different interests, aspirations, and personality types which makes us find excitement in whatever we do together. Friends take us out of our comfort zone, allow us to see aspects of ourselves we don’t normally see, help us change for the better, and allow us to create memories. We discover new things about the world together and plan for a better future.
4. They go through things “with” you and not just along with you.
This is one of the ways I personally can tell who will become a good friend. When someone goes through things with you, it means they keep in touch, give you good advice, and care enough to try to see things from your point of view. They feel your feels, and they want to know more about you. Not just what you are doing, but how “you” feel about things. All this comes from a sincere place in which they want to learn from you and vice versa. Over time, you become closer, and the friendship does not get old because it’s more than having simple company.
5. They simply care.
Everyone has heard the phrase “sharing is caring.” Caring, in this case, means sharing time, advice, and love. Someone who sees you are a friend will want to share things with you. It is not something you are forcing out of someone, rather a true friend would want to share things with you in an attempt to get closer to you. It’s as simple as that. Friends share things that go beyond the surface level, they let you into spaces that are very personal to them. In due times, a good, strong, and healthy friendship will gravitate towards that direction.