This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at UIC chapter.
Confessions of a fan girl:
CRAZY and amazing
This YouTube sensation
Satirical entity without shame
No, this one is different-special
A beautiful angel
His surreptitious glancing gets me by
Crying over you but it’s no use really
The pain goes away ONLY for a moment
Just another desperate fan girl
Is all one could think
I could never
I will never
Be more than what I am
With you and only you is where I should be
With you and your fantastic soul
God nor Satan can help me
Help me
I’m dying to see your beautiful smile
Your touch I wish to feel
Your voice I need to hear again
This man I crave
This man I cannot have
Cannot have once again
I’ll hold on to whatever I can
That one
This one that makes me cringe with excitement and joy
Then leaves me feeling breathless
Hopeless and drained
I’m struggling to keep my wits about me
Exaggeration
Infatuation-I’ll entertain that idea
But never
NEVER am I numb to what I am feeling
Fully aware, God I can see clearly now
This feeling gets me by
It keeps me high
It feels so good
So fake–so FAITH
Is all I have now
I fear what I cannot have
I fear what I have created
What have I created?
This sickening feeling I am powerless without it
I can’t get away from it
I hate it
But I want it more and more
I want it, yes I crave it
I cannot thrive
Thrive or function without it
It consumes me, controls ME
This daily obsession with an intangible being
You are a sad human being, you know that?
Frustrating
Yet here I am once again
I’m struggling to break free but nothing can ever be
Be as great as this phenomenal being
That happens to be loved by many
This Youtube sensation
Satisfaction is what I need
Need
I need to go back
So I’ll keep going back
Back again to watch your sweet face
And once again
Again I am lost in the world of cyberspace