Cards Against Humanity Saves America

Your favorite dirty pass-time has done it again, and not in the way you’re thinking.

A household name in our generation, the Cards Against Humanity game is risque and hilarious. Embracing taboos and the raunchy hilarity of sitting around a table with people just as messed up as you. So, in notorious CAH style, the Chicago based company is attempting to save America by raising their middle fingers towards the White House.

”It’s 2017, and the government is being run by a toilet. We have no choice: Cards Against Humanity is going to save America.” -CAH

As part of a new holiday promotion Cards Against Humanity promises to save America as well as a secret surprise delivered to your door. Selling out in just hours, the 15 dollar package is more than just additional cards with exaggerated advertising.

“Donald Trump is a preposterous golem who is afraid of Mexicans. He is so afraid that he wants to build a twenty-billion-dollar wall that everyone knows will accomplish nothing. So we’ve purchased a plot of vacant land on the border and retained a law firm specializing in eminent domain to make it as time-consuming and expensive as possible for the wall to get built.” -CAH

During the 2016 election, Donald Trump promised to build a wall along the border of the United States and Mexico. With obvious controversy around these statements, the “preposterous golem” was still elected, leading us all the way to present time. Among those dedicated to stopping the President from dividing people further is a group of comedy writers behind the scenes of Cards Against Humanity. And if you aren’t really sure what they’re saving America from, no one says it better than them in their FAQ.

“WHAT ARE YOU SAVING AMERICA FROM?

"Injustice, lies, racism, the whole enchilada.” -CAH

Being a US only promotion, Americans everywhere showed their opinions on the government by buying a card game. Going to show that when people come together and believe they have a voice, it can make an actual difference. A country divided is not as strong as it is together, and if Cards Against Humanity can understand that, so should the president. Who knew the same game with a card saying “Michelle Obama’s arms” would also be the one to save this country?

“I DON’T LIKE THAT YOU’RE GETTING POLITICAL. WHY DON’T YOU JUST STICK TO CARD GAMES?

"Why don’t you stick to seeing how many Hot Wheels cars you can fit up your asshole?” -CAH